


Actually About a Motorcycle

by orphan_account



Series: That Was More Like A Mouth Punch Than a Kiss [10]
Category: Kill la Kill
Genre: F/F, Satsuki is actually an ultra-level nerd, yeah you read those pairings right
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-06-19
Updated: 2016-06-03
Packaged: 2018-02-05 09:23:23
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 20,411
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1813375
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In which Ryuko, Nonon, and Satsuki discuss Ancient Aliens, prolapsed assholes, and a motorbike, and prove that, once again, all three of them are complete idiots in their own special way.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

It took Ryuko about a week to realize that _yeah, two girlfriends was weird_. Not weird in a bad way, weird in a good way, like how trying a new food was like, or stepping in those odd sticky patches of sand in the ocean felt. Communication definitely helped, and Ryuko had been with Satsuki long enough for them to not be a problem. They kept to their old habits, saw each other when they wanted to, didn’t see each other when they didn’t.

Nonon, however, was uncharted territory. Sure, she had learned how to press a few buttons of hers, she knew she played the tuba, and she knew she was still pretty in love with Satsuki, but beyond that, Ryuko honestly didn’t even know her that well. They spent more time together, and whenever Nonon would pull one of her “hey I’m outside your apartment playing some fucking Bach or whatever this composer is,” Ryuko would sigh, put some clothes on, meet her out front and go do something stupid with her, usually involving driving around in her hummer until Ryuko got motion sickness then going over to her place and watching Nonon’s incredibly vast collection of grindhouse films.

Being with Nonon in general was weird but in a good way. With Satsuki, communication between each other was so simple, they barely even needed words at this point. Satsuki would come over, they’d fuck for a while, have idle pillow talk, watch a movie or something, Ryuko would get her cuddle on. At that point, Satsuki would either announce her departure or stay the night -the latter decision being more and more frequent. Rinse and repeat.

With Nonon, however, _everything_ about their relationship was about words -though it didn’t help that Ryuko was comparing this relationship to one she’d been in for months already. They were verbal snipers to each other, constantly in a battle to one-up the other. Nonon was mildly impressed that she was able to keep up with her.

Hell, _Ryuko_ was impressed that she could keep up with her. There were so many words involved that it made her head hurt, but getting out of an argument and into having Nonon’s lips press against hers usually seemed to ease the pain.

Ryuko sighed and scratched her head, refocusing on American Pickers playing on the massive screen in front of her.

“Shithead,” Nonon said as she passed her by before sitting down at the couch, “are you thinking again? You look like you’re in pain.”

Ryuko grunted and sprawled on top of her, head resting on her lap. She was at Nonon’s place, mostly because Mako and Gamagori were having their double date with Iori and Houka and neither of them were interested in spending the night alone. “Shut up,” Ryuko said, glancing up at her. “I’m not stupid.”

Nonon just rolled her eyes and patted Ryuko’s face, who reached up and did the same to her with both of her hands. She squished her cheeks between her palms and grinned, and Nonon just huffed in response. “When’s Satsuki coming over?” Ryuko asked, as Nonon ran her thumb over one of her brows, smoothing it out, then moved onto the other one.

“Soon. She said she was bringing some homework over. You know how finals are,” Nonon answered, face still squished. “Could you stop that?”

“Stop what? I’m not doing anything,” Ryuko answered, smirking up at her. Nonon just flared her nostrils at her and Ryuko just attempted to shove her thumbs up her nose. Nonon reeled back with a yelp and Ryuko laughed. In one fluid motion she sat up and slid onto Nonon’s lap, loosening her grip on her cheeks in order to lean in and press a quick kiss to her lips.

“Ugh, get off me, you’re heavy,” Nonon whined, palms halfheartedly pressing against Ryuko’s shoulders. Ryuko lifted a brow, expression hurt.

“You trying to tell me something, Troll Doll?” She demanded. “You can carry your precious tuba for forever, but you’re crushed under me in like five seconds?”

“You weigh more than my tuba, you idiot,” she said, as Ryuko shifted around to rest her knees on either side of Nonon’s thighs. “Thank you,” she said when Ryuko only half-settled her weight on her.

“I don’t weigh more than your tuba, by the way, that thing is almost as heavy than the weights I lift.” Ryuko added, “And I lift. Trust me.” She flexed for good measure, smirking down at her.

Nonon didn’t seem particularly impressed. “Move over, I’m missing American Pickers,” she said.

“Wow,” Ryuko said, deflating. “Why the fuck did you even invite me over?”

“Definitely not to appreciate your muscles, as nice as they are,” Nonon said, eyes flicking from the television to focus back on Ryuko. “I’m not the body worshipper here.”

Ryuko frowned and flushed, opening her mouth before huffing and promptly shutting it again. The other woman grinned, victorious, then turned her attention back to her show.

“Troll Doll,” Ryuko whined.

Nonon quirked a brow and cupped her face without shifting her attentions. “You’re like an infant, I’m dating an infant,” she said, exasperated.

“Wow, well prepare to go to jail because you’re dating a literal baby,” Ryuko shot back, sitting down on her properly. “Goo goo gah gah, motherfucker.”

Nonon’s lips quivered as she stifled a laugh, and she bowed her head and brought her free hand to her mouth, shoulders shaking. “You’re so embarrassing,” she managed before she tossed her head back and cackled. Ryuko joined in, leaning over to nuzzle against her exposed neck, and her laughter petered out at the sensation, shifting to pleased breathy moans.

“Still focusing on American Pickers?” Ryuko asked, lips vibrating against her jugular. She felt her shudder beneath her, and she hummed in response, pressed her lips to her collarbone.

“Oh shut up, it’s not a contest,” Nonon said, biting down on her lip when Ryuko lapped at her neck. They met eyes. Ryuko grinned up at her, nipping at her. She cupped her face and brought her up from her neck to place a quick kiss to her lips before she said, “I really do want to watch this, though. And Satsuki’s coming over.”

“It’s your shorts, they make you totally irresistible,” she said, smirking at her and pressing a kiss of her own on the corner of Nonon’s mouth, teasing. Nonon let out a quiet laugh before she silenced herself and punctuated her last point with a shove, aiming to move her sideways and off of her. Ryuko sighed and clambered off, but she managed to coax one last kiss from Nonon before she turned her attention completely on the show.

Ryuko reached out and ran her fingers over the small expanse of skin between Nonon’s shorts and her thigh highs on one of her legs, thumb dipping under the fabric of the sock to rub there. Nonon murmured appreciatively, shifting closer to her, and Ryuko smirked at her, gauging her reactions.

Nonon was much more expressive than Satsuki. It wasn’t a bad thing or a good thing, but it was certainly fun to get Nonon to make these ridiculous faces. Satsuki’s entire set of emotions could be represented by the way her eyebrows tilted; you didn’t even have to see the rest of her face, if you knew Satsuki well enough, you knew her eyebrow quirks. Nonon, on the other hand, was an easier read. She bit her lip, and swallowed, and shifted, and sometimes, when she was really feeling it, her entire face just screwed up and it made Ryuko feel both amused and aroused all at once.

Ryuko snapped her garter and sighed, Nonon still moving closer and closer until she could rest her head on her shoulder, eyes half-lidded.

“Hey,” Ryuko said suddenly during a commercial break, shifting in order to rest her chin on Nonon’s head. “Hey. Troll Doll.”

“Hrm?” Nonon grunted, patting Ryuko’s thigh.

“Are we together… Just because you can’t get Eyebrows?” Ryuko demanded, brows furrowing. Nonon pulled away, the deepest frown Ryuko had ever seen her pull on her face.

“What the fuck kind of stupid question is that,” she said, phrasing it not as a question but as a statement, and Ryuko bristled at that.

“I dunno! It’s just, I mean, like--” she paused, scratched her mane of hair. “Like, you couldn’t have just forgotten about Eyebrows, y’know--”

“You can call her Satsuki, you know. I won’t tell her,” Nonon interrupted, and Ryuko let out a frustrated groan.

“Whatever. Fine. Forget I ever asked, if you’re not gonna answer me,” Ryuko grumbled, turning away from her and waving a hand in her direction dismissively.

“Hey. Stupid. Stupid Shithead,” Nonon said, trying to grab her attention again. Nonon sighed and rolled her eyes, settled down next to her but gave her some space. “God, you think you’re the only person in the world capable of liking two people at once? You think you’re a fucking special snowflake?” Ryuko glanced away and grunted, and Nonon pressed her advantage. “How fucking stupid are you, huh? How entitled, how fucking obtuse do you have to be for me to explain this to you?”

Ryuko grumbled under her breath. The shorter woman just rolled her eyes.

“What was that?” Nonon asked, quirking a brow, and when Ryuko didn’t articulate, she said, “Fine, fuck. Don’t believe me, you insecure piece of shit.” She huffed and leaned back against the couch.

Ryuko glanced over at her, shoulders hunched. “I’m not insecure,” Ryuko mumbled, turning to face her properly. Nonon lifted a brow, and Ryuko’s own brows furrowed. “I’m not. I just. I don’t.” She sighed. “Whatever, you’re right. I’m stupid.”

Nonon immediately grabbed her face and tugged her down to her eye level. “Only I can call you stupid, stupid. And Satsuki, I guess. It’s a term of endearment, you fucking moron,” she said, holding back a puff of laughter.

Ryuko growled and she opened her mouth to say something, but Nonon tugged at the corners of her mouth with her thumbs. “Could you calm down, huh? Did you have to go over this with Satsuki?”

Ryuko stilled and said, “Well, no,” her voice muffled by the thumbs in her mouth.

“So you doubt me? Is that what you’re saying?”

“No!” She reached up and tugged Nonon’s hands away from her face. “It’s a completely different situation! Eyebr--” she paused at the look Nonon gave her and sighed, rephrasing, “Satsuki hasn’t been in love with her best friend since the day they met!” Nonon flushed, half from embarrassment, half from anger, and Ryuko groaned, shifting closer to her. “Fuck, I didn’t mean it like that, Nonon--”

Nonon interrupted her with a slap to the face. It wasn’t even hard, probably wasn’t even going to leave a mark, but Ryuko reeled back at that, surprised, and she silenced herself. Nonon sighed and eased herself onto her lap, settling her hands on her shoulders. “Sorry,” she muttered, and Ryuko grunted, turning her head to the side in order to bite down on her forearm and suck. Nonon hissed at the sensation but didn’t pull away, leaving Ryuko to mark her. “I mean, I understand why you asked me, I was just… I was angry. Which, I mean, isn’t really an excuse,” she continued, when Ryuko turned her attention back to her.

“You didn’t even slap me right,” Ryuko countered, grinning up at her, cackling when Nonon just rolled her eyes and made to move off of her. “Oh, no, don’t get off!”

Nonon froze and stared at Ryuko. Ryuko finally understood what people meant when someone looked like they were a deer caught in the headlights. Ryuko scrambled to correct herself, flushing furiously. “Of me! Don’t get off of _me_!”

Nonon just lifted a brow, unconvinced. “I always assumed you were pretty selfish with your orgasms, but this takes it to a whole other level. Denying me before we’ve even had sex,” she said, completely straight-faced.

Ryuko sputtered, fingers fumbling to grab Nonon’s hips and fix her position to get her properly straddling her hips again. “I am not selfish with my orgasms,” she said, though she hesitated afterwards and added, “Okay, I might have been when I started having sex, but I’m good now I swear!”

Nonon laughed and shoved her shoulder, and Ryuko let out a few laughs of her own. “God, you’re such an asshole,” Nonon said, pressing her forehead to Ryuko’s. “A massive, giant, disgusting prolapsed asshole.”

Ryuko choked on her own saliva at that, tossing her head back and laughing. Nonon sent her an almost-grin, teeth barely showing under her lips, before she bent over and kissed her neck. Ryuko’s laughter was cut short at that, murmuring her approval. “Oh,” she said, back arching when Nonon bit down at the junction where neck met shoulder. Nonon’s hands found her wrists and she brought them to her neck, and Ryuko immediately clung there, tugging her closer. “Troll Doll--”

“I have a name, Shithead,” Nonon said, popping her mouth off her neck with a frown. She paused, added, “I just realized the irony in that sentence.”

Ryuko would have laughed at her expense but her mouth was on her neck again, sucking hard, and Ryuko’s fingers fumbled with the baby hairs at the base of her scalp. “Tr--” she started, but thinking of what had just been said, she instead stuttered, “N-Nonon.”

She could feel Nonon smirk against her neck at that, biting down again. “There we go, was that so difficult?” She asked, and Ryuko just grunted and grit her teeth in response, tugging her off her neck in order to pull her into a kiss. Nonon let out a surprised noise from the back of her throat but didn’t seem to be put off by the change, but she pulled away after a few moments -or rather, she tangled her fingers in Ryuko’s hair and pulled _Ryuko_ away. Ryuko glanced up at her, confused. “Oh. Uh. I forgot to answer your question because both of our heads were so far up our asses.”

“I don’t want my head in my ass, I want my head in you--” Ryuko started, grinning, before she was interrupted.

“No, let’s not finish that sentence,” Nonon said. “Either way you’re like an entire prolapsed asshole so really I don’t know how your head would even fit there, but whatever.”

“What if I just like. I took the ass sack--”

“The _ass sack_? Is there a part of biology that hasn’t been covered in school curriculum?”

“What? Like I mean, that’s not the technical term but like the ass sack is the thing that… The thing that prolapses out of your ass, right? Something vaguely ass-sack-like has gotta be coming out there. It’s like a pocket, right?” Ryuko explained, brows furrowed in complete seriousness.

“Look, I like that you’ve thought about prolapsed asses and what comes out of them in great detail, Shithead--”

“Hey, why do you get to call me Shithead and I can’t call you Troll Doll?” Ryuko interrupted.

“You can call me Troll Doll when I’m not sucking on your neck and doing whatever it is we do, and I won’t call you Shithead during that same amount of time. Like, nothing’s less sexy than calling someone fucking Shithead or Troll Doll, I thought that was a given,” Nonon explained, barely skipping a beat. Ryuko blinked a few times before she nodded, understanding, and Nonon paused and asked, “What the hell was I talking about?”

“Uh, something about… never answering my question?” Ryuko suggested, leaning back against the couch and moving her hands to rest on Nonon’s  hips.

“Right. Thanks,” Nonon said, awkwardly landing a congratulatory pat on Ryuko’s face. “Right. So, to answer your question, I’m not dating you just because I can’t get Satsuki. I chose to date you, it wasn’t like I have no fucking free will.” She cleared her throat, added “Also, I can totally get Satsuki.”

“Oh, of course. I mean, you got a catch like me,” Ryuko said, grinning.

Nonon frowned. “What the fuck is that supposed to mean? Are you underselling yourself, or?” When Ryuko did nothing other than rub circles into her hips and grin that stupid, dopey, attractive grin of hers, she growled,  “You think you’re the only person in the world who can have two girlfriends?”

The woman underneath her just kept grinning, shifting up for a quick kiss that Nonon halfheartedly returned. “Look, if you’re asking for help with this, I can totally help,” she said, either ignoring or completely oblivious to Nonon’s knitted brows and reddening face.

“I don’t need help,” Nonon hissed, as though Satsuki were in the same room with them right at that moment. She hesitated, let out a quiet huff. “But I mean, if you’re offering to help out…” She trailed off, quirked a brow, silently asking if Ryuko actually needed her to clarify for her.

“Oh, of course, of course,” she responded, tapping an inconsistent rhythm on Nonon’s hips with her fingers. “We can start tonight if you’re really that eager.”

Nonon pursed her lips. “Don’t we have to… make plans?”

“Troll Doll. Seriously. Chill the fuck out. What’s with you and plans? Didn’t you plan a whole speech for me when we smoked that first time, how well did that go?”

“First time? I think you mean only time,” she snapped back at her. When Ryuko only lifted a brow in response, goading her to keep talking, she added, “And not very well. What’s your point?”

Ryuko slouched back against the couch. “My _point_ is that we don’t need a plan, just follow my lead. I never need plans, and look where I am.”

Nonon sneered at her before she relaxed and rubbed her eyes. “Fuck. Fine. Whatever. I’m trusting you, Shithead. Don’t screw this up for me.” She rested her hands back on Ryuko’s shoulders, straightened out the fabric of her shirt, eased herself lower to press a kiss to her lips then added, with rare softness, “Or either of us, really.”

Ryuko grunted, appeased, and tugged Nonon closer in order for her to press her nose against her pulse. She circled her arms around her waist, shifted closer, let out a quiet sigh and relaxed against her.

“Oh, are you just gonna stay like this?” She asked. When Ryuko didn’t shift or say anything, she just leaned against her and scratched at the base of her scalp. “Alright. Fine. At least you’re behaving tonight.” Ryuko just made a pleased noise from the back of her throat and peppered kisses along Nonon’s neck, who sighed and slipped her eyes shut in response. Still, the moment was short-lived, as the doorbell to her apartment rang. With a groan, Ryuko tugged her closer and landed one last kiss on her neck before she let her shift off of her lap to answer the door. Ryuko sat back and occupied her hands with the fringes of one of the decorative pillows on Nonon’s stupid expensive couch.

“Is it Eyebrows?” Ryuko called out, glancing over her shoulder to watch Nonon waiting at the door.

“Of course it’s her, who do you think it is? A pizza guy?” Nonon answered, rolling her eyes. The eyeroll effect was lessened by the fact that Ryuko couldn’t really _see_ it, but she could certainly feel it. Nonon’s eyerolls were almost an equivalent force to Satsuki’s brow quirks.

“I want pizza now,” Ryuko said, scratching at the recently-made hickey on her neck.

Nonon opened the door in advance and stuck one of Inumuta’s shoes in the door’s threshold before she said, “Do you really want some? You can order it, I’m a little hungry myself.”

“Everything about you is little,” she said, grinning at the other woman. Nonon just stopped in her tracks and frowned, and Ryuko hastily added, “I do want pizza though!”

“Do you?”

Ryuko nodded as though her life depended on getting pizza.

Nonon held her stare for a few more moments before she deflated and mumbled, “Yeah, me too.” She pulled out her cell phone, rifled through a cabinet and pulled out a take-out leaflet. As she dialed the number, she said, “Satsuki’s on her way up, but she’s not getting any say in toppings, I don’t want anchovies on my pizza, thanks.” Ryuko snorted and watched Nonon bring the phone to her ear. “Hey, do you have any topping preferences?”

“Not really,” Ryuko answered with a noncommittal shrug, and Nonon nodded, turning her attention back to the phone. She jumped when the door creaked open the rest of the way, but both of them relaxed when they saw it was just Satsuki. She bent down for Nonon’s customary cheek kiss, who flushed and absently leaned into it before she went back to getting her order through. “Oh, hi,” Ryuko murmured when Satsuki drew close to the couch, and she reached up to grab the front of her shirt and tug her in for a quick kiss that Satsuki immediately deepened. Ryuko didn’t seem too put off by that and easily reciprocated, but she pulled away after a few moments. “Sorry, just don’t want to get a crick in my neck,” she said, shifting around to settle down on the couch more comfortably. “Stressed?” She asked, letting out a surprised noise when Satsuki bent down for another kiss.

“Incredibly so,” she responded when they parted, and she dumped her bag -a massive, black bag that looked more expensive than most of Ryuko’s furniture, although that didn’t take very much- on the couch before walking around the back in order to take her own seat at the end of it, next to Ryuko. “What’s she ordering?”

“Pizza,” Ryuko responded, and Satsuki just hummed, pulling out papers from her bag with a quiet sigh. “Studying?”

Satsuki nodded, rifling through her sheets, and Ryuko watched her, toying with the fringe of one of the pillows again. “Don’t you have finals, too?” She demanded, scanning a page before leaning back and reading it properly.

Ryuko shrugged, made a noise from the back of her throat. “Well, yeah, but I don’t really study for that stuff,” she articulated after a few moments.

“I’m surprised you and your coconut sister don’t study together,” Nonon said as she ended the phone call.

“Well, we do, technically, but I usually just toss paper around while she reads her notes out loud,” Ryuko said, as Nonon made her way back to the couch. “I mean, I’m not that bad at school, I just don’t really have the patience for it.” She leaned back, watched as Nonon’s face screwed up. “What’s going on with your face there, you smell something?”

Nonon’s face just screwed up even further at that, and Ryuko let out a quiet laugh. “I wanted to sit next to Satsuki,” Nonon finally said, and Ryuko’s laughter just escalated, patting her lap. With a sigh reserved only for Ryuko, she did as was suggested, resting her back against Ryuko’s chest. “There, now we solved two problems: you get to sit next to Satsuki, and I don’t have to see your face,” she said. Nonon frowned and reached behind her in order to pap Ryuko’s face in an attempt to silence her. Satsuki snorted at the spectacle, unconsciously leaning against the two of them. “Oh, hello,” Ryuko said, once again surprised by Satsuki being the one to initiate contact with her. Satsuki just hummed and flipped through her notes again, and Ryuko looked over her shoulder to read through them. “What the fuck is all of this?”

“Finance,” was all the other woman replied, pausing on one of her sheets to glance at a question. She tugged out her pen and answered the question before flicking her eyes up to watch the television screen. “Is this the History channel? What’s on after this?”

Ryuko scrambled for the remote and, after trying to decipher how it worked for a good thirty seconds, Nonon grabbed it from her and did it herself, exasperated. “Oh. Ancient Aliens is on later, ugh. You want me to change it?”

Satsuki’s eyes widened and she shook her head. “No, don’t change it,” she answered, almost too quickly.

Ryuko lifted a brow. “You like this show?” She asked.

Satsuki cleared her throat, apparently recovering from her reaction to the prospect of watching her alien show. “Its theories are laughable. I enjoy it because of that,” she said, going back to looking down at her papers.

Nonon glanced up at Ryuko, mouthed “No,” and sent her a smirk. Ryuko quietly snorted -or well, tried to quietly snort- and Satsuki just sent the two of them a glare.

“This information does not leave this apartment,” was all Satsuki said on the subject, leaving it at that. She turned back to her notes, answered practice questions. Ryuko left the channel running and watched the rest of American Pickers, absently wrapping her arms around Nonon’s waist and settling her head on her shoulder.

“Satsuki, is Shithead always this clingy?” Nonon asked, although she leaned back against her and curled her fingers around her wrists.

“Oh yes, she’s like a koala, or a weed,” Satsuki answered, turning her attention away from her studies in order to plant a kiss on Ryuko’s neck. She paused, however, when she saw the hickey. “Your work, Nonon?” She asked, mouthing at it, and Ryuko let out a quiet gasp, tilting her head up to give her more access and pressing her face to Nonon’s neck.

Nonon jumped at both of their proximities and flushed at Satsuki’s stare, but she managed to say, “Oh, uh, yeah.”

Satsuki hummed and shifted her mouth slightly higher to suck a mark of her own. Ryuko groaned and she reached up to pull Satsuki closer, pulling Nonon’s arm up in the process. Nonon let go of Ryuko’s wrist, inched up to curl her fingers in Satsuki’s hair. Satsuki lifted her eyes to look over at Nonon but she didn’t do anything more than let out a quiet grunt of approval, biting down on Ryuko’s neck. She moved away once she was satisfied and Ryuko leaned back in her seat and rubbed at the new mark on her neck. Nonon settled back and rested her head on her collarbone, absently scratching at Satsuki’s head, who let out a surprised but altogether pleased noise, shifting closer to settle her chin on Ryuko’s unoccupied shoulder.

Ryuko lifted a brow at the two of them, settled her hands on either of their hips. “You guys are like people blankets,” she said, “Ultra-comfortable.” The two women only let out their own amused, slightly indignant noises at that, and Ryuko just smirked down at the two of them and moved her hands higher, pressing against the small of Satsuki’s back and absently cupping one of Nonon’s breasts with about the least sexual intentions. Nonon gasped and muttered an insult under her breath but otherwise didn’t seem adverse to the hand’s new position; Satsuki settled more comfortably against her and sighed. “What kind of pizza did you get, finally?” Ryuko asked, rubbing circles into Satsuki’s back and drawing patterns above Nonon’s breast with her thumb, satisfied with the murmurs of appreciation the two of them voiced.

“Meat lover’s,” Nonon said, pressing a quick kiss to Ryuko’s neck before shifting on her side to rest more comfortably against her.

“Trying to tell me something, Troll Doll?” Ryuko asked, giving her a squeeze that made Nonon yelp at. Ryuko immediately retreated and pressed an apologetic kiss to her temple, shifting her hand to rest at the base of her scalp, once again playing with the baby hair there.

“I’m not even sure what you’re trying to suggest here,” she shot back, although she leaned against her hand and barely managed to contain a pleased huff. She was going to add another thing before she caught Satsuki’s stare and paused. “W-what?” Was all she could manage.

Satsuki shrugged, the slightest trace of a smile on her lips. “Nothing,” she answered, leaving a kiss of her own on Ryuko’s neck, who hummed and shifted her hand up to scratch at Satsuki’s scalp, too. “Just content that you two are getting along.” She slipped her eyes shut and sighed when Ryuko’s fingers threaded through her hair.

Ryuko took that chance to look down at Nonon and, in the most subtle way possible, jerk her head in Satsuki’s direction. Her fingers pressed at Nonon’s scalp, encouraging, and the woman’s eyes widened but she complied, shifting closer to Satsuki. When Satsuki opened her eyes again, she only blinked and quirked a brow in her direction, using her usual silent interrogation technique. The pads of Ryuko’s fingers stroked at her scalp, trying to goad and calm all at once, and Nonon took a deep breath in and swallowed.

“Satsuki,” Nonon said, holding her gaze, “can I kiss you?”

Satsuki’s other unraised eyebrow joined the raised one.

“On the lips,” Ryuko clarified, trying to help her out.

Satsuki’s eyes darted from Nonon, to Ryuko and then back to Nonon. “You want to?” She looked back to Ryuko, brows finally settling back down. “ _Both_ of you want to?”

“Well, Troll Doll’s always complaining, so-- ow!” Nonon had slapped Ryuko’s stomach and she interrupted herself. “The Hell was that for?”

“Oh calm down, I barely touched you, you drama queen,” Nonon said to Ryuko before she turned her attention back to Satsuki. “But yeah, we’re both fine with it if you are.”

Satsuki examined Nonon before she pursed her lips and glanced away, deep in thought. “So, Matoi wasn’t lying? About you? You weren’t joking about your feelings for me?”

“Oh, here we go again,” Ryuko grumbled, settling more comfortably against the couch and leaning back so that she could look at Satsuki properly. “Listen, Nonon’s in fucking love with you, get it through your stupid dumb… stupid head of yours.”

Nonon shushed Ryuko and she shrugged helplessly in response. “Ryuko’s way of putting it wouldn’t exactly be how I would have said it, but yeah that’s basically it,” she said, and Ryuko let out a snort and scratched at her scalp. Ryuko leaned over and, still looking at Nonon, she whispered something in Satsuki’s ear and kissed her there, smirking when Nonon flushed all over again. Satsuki glanced up at her with a quirked brow as she pulled away.

“That’s true,” Satsuki murmured, before focusing back on Nonon and shifting closer to her. She cupped her face and pulled her closer, close enough that Nonon could smell her breath -she had drank green tea before coming here, and hot leaf juice never smelled so good to Nonon until this moment. Nonon sucked in a breath when Satsuki’s lips brushed over hers. “May I?” Satsuki asked, and Nonon struggled not to nod frantically and instead managed a quiet, “yes.”

Satsuki kissed her, softly, not as if she were delicate and was afraid to hurt her but as though she was making sure she covered all her bases before she pressed harder, urging her to open her mouth with the thumb on her cheek. Nonon complied, her fingers curling around Satsuki’s wrists and pressing back with just as much zeal. It wasn’t exactly a life-changing kiss -really, it was just a slightly better kiss than Ryuko’s, but only because Ryuko was just not the best kisser even after both Nonon’s and Satsuki’s combined efforts- but it felt _good_ and Nonon’s heart felt like it was about to burst. It very nearly did when Ryuko voiced her encouragement, a noiseless groan, and pressed her fingers to squeeze at the nape of her neck. Nonon gasped against Satsuki’s mouth and she knew Ryuko did the same to Satsuki when she made a noise of her own, a low growl that came from the back of her throat.

They pulled away from each other and Satsuki pressed forward again, this time leaving a quick kiss on the corner of her mouth before letting out a murmured, “I’m sorry, Nonon,” and kissing her again. “I didn’t even know, I’m an oblivious idiot.”

“It’s fine, it’s fine,” Nonon said, returning her kisses. “But you _are_ right about the idiot thing, at least a little.”

Ryuko cleared her throat and glanced down at the two of them. “Y’know, it’s nice that you two are having a moment, but you _do_ have someone to thank here,” she said. “Especially you, Troll Doll.”

Nonon scoffed. “I never said I needed your help,” she said dismissively.

“Uh, you totally did, like not even fifteen minutes ago,” Ryuko argued. “It was a thing that just happened. Is your memory that bad?”

Nonon flushed and coughed, and Ryuko smirked down at her.

“Usually I’d never forgive you for completely forgetting what great help I’ve been,” Ryuko said, putting on fake airs for dramatic effect, “But since, as you said, I’m being good today--”

“Oh shut up,” Nonon interrupted, exasperated.

Ryuko paused, frowning, before she pressed on. “ _Since I’m being good today_ ,” she repeated, and she stopped to make sure Nonon wouldn’t interrupt her again and when she didn’t she just grinned and said, “All I need for me to forgive you is a kiss from you.”

Nonon blinked once. “Are you serious?” She finally said, not sure whether to laugh or frown.

“Oh, I’m _very_ serious,” Ryuko answered with a slow nod, feigning sageness, the fingers at Nonon’s neck tugging her up to eye-level. “Kissing is a very important part of the forgiveness process, isn’t it, Eyebrows?”

Satsuki’s lips curled upwards, incredibly amused by their antics, and she said, “Oh, yes. Very important.”

“I’m not even sure if ‘the forgiveness process’ is even a thing,” Nonon griped. She brushed her lips over Ryuko’s, teasing. “You just want me to kiss you.”

“What? Never,” Ryuko said, grinning. “Why the fuck would I want to kiss you?”

“You just asked me to, you idiot,” Nonon said.

Ryuko’s grin faltered. “Oh. Right.” She pursed her lips. “Fuck.”

Nonon lifted a brow at Ryuko’s forlorn expression before she said, “Well, it’s a good thing I want to kiss you, then.”

“Score,” Ryuko said as she tugged her closer. Ryuko didn’t waste any time, cupping Nonon’s cheek and kissing her, open-mouthed. Nonon let out a pleased purr and shifted closer, groaning when Ryuko pulled at her lower lip between her teeth. They pulled away and Ryuko hummed, brushing her thumb on Nonon’s pulse point, and Nonon leaned into the touch, letting out a sigh and lidding her eyes over. “You now,” Ryuko said to Satsuki, leaning towards her. Satsuki met her halfway, a pleased smirk on her lips. Nonon scratched at Ryuko’s scalp and Ryuko groaned, pawing at the two of them. “Fuck, I wish I had two mouths, even if I’d look like a fucking monster,” Ryuko said. “Then I could make out twice as much.”

“I don’t think I’d be all that interested in you if you had two mouths, really,” Satsuki said, before Ryuko moved in for another quick kiss that she very graciously accepted.

“Yeah, same here,” Nonon agreed. “You’d look fucking horrifying. Plus, you can barely multitask kissing one person, let alone two.” She smirked up at Ryuko, who scoffed at both of their remarks, obviously unconvinced to how uncool being a dual-mouthed abomination would be. Satsuki glanced over at Nonon, shifted closer to her. Nonon flushed but mirrored her actions and said, “Oh, is this a thing that’ll regularly happen now?”

Satsuki leaned back, one characteristic brow quirked up. “Do you not want it to?”

Nonon immediately shook her head. “No, I didn’t mean it like that, I just didn’t… I didn’t expect it to be that easy.”

Satsuki shrugged. “It was some miscommunication on my part. I didn’t think you were actually interested,” she said, leaning back in to press a quick kiss to her lips.

“Wait. Wait,” Nonon said after the kiss, brows furrowing. “ _You_ didn’t think I was interested? Were you interested?”

Satsuki swallowed. “Well,” she started, glancing away and toying with the hem of Ryuko’s shirt, “Perhaps.”

Nonon blinked. Satsuki took it as a cue to continue.

“You were very cute when you were younger,” was all she said. “You were my first crush, actually. I think it was the hair.”

Nonon sputtered and hid her face in Ryuko’s neck. “Oh my God,” Nonon muttered, and she repeated the phrase about fifteen times before she turned around and tugged Satsuki in for a kiss, deep and unlike the others. It was hungry, desperate, impatient, and Satsuki only deepened it, whispering her approval to her between kisses.

Ryuko let out a surprised grunt but she shifted over and nuzzled at both of their necks, taking the time to chomp down on Satsuki’s and lap at Nonon’s. Satsuki groaned, quiet and half-restrained, pulling both Ryuko and Nonon closer. Ryuko’s mouth found Nonon’s ear and she nipped at her lobe.

“Hey, can I touch your tits while you make out with Eyebrows?” She asked, her hand dipping under Nonon’s shirt, pressing at her belly.

“Yes, yeah, fuck yes,” Nonon managed before kissing Satsuki again. Satsuki hummed but broke away, only in order for her to duck down and mouth at Nonon’s neck.

“She’s really sensitive there,” Ryuko murmured, drifting her mouth back down to press a kiss at Nonon’s neck. Satsuki glanced over at her, eyes lidded, and Ryuko closed the distance between them, nails digging into her scalp, teeth catching on her lower lip. The kiss was quick, however, and Ryuko shifted away to mouth at the nape of Nonon’s neck, cupping one of her breasts through her bra and voicing quiet, husky encouragements that sent an involuntary shiver down Nonon’s spine. With the new information Satsuki had received, she found Nonon’s pulsepoint and placed butterfly kisses there, smirking at the noises she made and the way she tried to lean into both of their touches at once.

“Well, really,” Ryuko said, reconsidering, as she slipped her fingers under Nonon’s bra and pushed it up, “I was going to say she was sensitive here, too, but I think she’s just sensitive everywhere.” Satsuki let out a snort and Nonon made a frustrated half-gasp half-growl at Ryuko’s commentary.

“Haah-- Satsuki, shut Ryuko up please,” she said, reaching behind her in order to tug at Ryuko’s hair.

“Not Shithead?” Satsuki asked as she complied, barely even having to coax Ryuko into a kiss.

“No, we went over this e-earlier, --actually, you weren’t here so I’ll forgive you-- Sh-iiit-head is decidedly unsexy,” Nonon replied, breath catching when Ryuko twirled her nipple piercing between her fingers. Satsuki hummed against Ryuko’s mouth, acknowledging her.

“Would it be alright if I took off your shirt?” Satsuki asked, shifting away from Ryuko in order to carefully bump foreheads with Nonon.

Nonon flushed and coughed, but she nodded, and Satsuki’s fingers tugged at the hem of her old sweater. Ryuko helped her tug it off, the static from the wooly sweater raising the hairs on the back of Nonon’s neck.

“Taking off your stupid hat, too,” Ryuko mumbled, already taking the piece of clothing in question off.

“Fine, but don’t laugh at my roots,” Nonon replied, and the other woman immediately went to investigate her scalp.

“She’s a natural blonde,” Satsuki said, running her thumbs under her bra straps in order to straighten them out. Ryuko let out a grunt, understanding, and her hand on her breast retreated in order to tug at the clasps of her bra.

Ryuko nosed at Nonon’s temple and ran her thumbs under the clasps. “Can I take this off or are we moving too fast?” She asked, smirking against her skin when she let out a restrained groan.

“Are you kidding me? No offense to you, Shithead, but I’ve wanted Satsuki to touch my tits since I watched Terminator for the first time, and there was that sex scene that my mom told me to cover my eyes for but I did that thing, you know, where you peek between your fingers,” Nonon explained, huffing when all Ryuko did in response was laugh and unclasp her bra. “Another thing,” she continued, tilting her head back to give Satsuki better access to her neck, “why do I always lose my bra? Seriously, what the-- fuck--!”

While Nonon spoke, Satsuki had busied herself with taking off her bra. The moment her fingers touched her breasts, Nonon’s sentence was cut short. She felt both women smirk against her neck, one in front, the other behind her. Satsuki was all lips, mouthing and kissing at her but by no means gentle, promising more, her absurd patience felt like she was being driven mad. Ryuko, on the other hand, was teeth and tongue, and while she got saliva all over the back of her neck, Nonon found she didn’t even mind. Satsuki leaned her forehead against Nonon’s neck in order to see what she was doing with her hands. Her thumbs circled her areolae, gauging her reactions, and Ryuko shifted higher to nudge against her ear, watching Satsuki work. Fingers threading through her hair, Ryuko goaded Satsuki lower, who didn’t seem like she was about to complain at all from the change of pace.

“Careful with your teeth, those piercings of hers make her really--” Ryuko was cut off by Nonon’s quiet, breathy gasp, “--sensitive.” Satsuki swirled her tongue around her nipple, her and Ryuko meeting each other’s stares. Nonon pressed up against Ryuko, face against her neck, shoulder almost painfully digging into her chest. As Satsuki shifted to her other breast, Nonon’s fingers twined with Ryuko’s. She peppered kisses against her neck as she arched against Satsuki’s mouth. So preoccupied with each other, the three of them jolted upright almost simultaneously when the apartment’s doorbell buzzed.

“Jesus Christ. Whenever I’m with you, Shithead, I always get caught with my shirt off,” Nonon said immediately, flushing and gathering up her bra and shirt. She shuddered when Ryuko nosed at her ear, but she shoved her away, frowning. “What the fuck, you stupid animal, I need to get the door before the pizza guy thinks I was kidding about ordering it,” she said, and Ryuko just chuckled, wrapping her arms around her waist and sparing a glance at Satsuki.

“I’ll get it,” was all Satsuki said.

Nonon sputtered. “You’re not going to help me?”

Satsuki shrugged, smirking. “You got yourself into this.”

Nonon huffed and leaned back against Ryuko, who gingerly grabbed her bra and shirt before flinging them with a violent fervor, missing a potted plant by about three inches. “You’re stupid and I hate you,” Nonon grumbled to Ryuko, who merely mouthed at the back of her neck. “Save your biting for the pizza,” she added, swatting her hand behind her and landing a halfhearted blow to Ryuko’s temple, who whined.

“Troll Doll, seriously, lighten _up_ ,” she said, snapping her garters at the last word. Nonon yelped and Ryuko chuckled, mumbling a half-assed apology. “Eyebrows literally just sucked on your tits, you’re still in my lap, we’re getting pizza and neither of us are even paying for it. Just relax.”

Nonon huffed again, and Ryuko leaned back, settling her chin on Nonon’s shoulder. “I fucking hate this show,” Nonon mumbled, and Ryuko just grunted, agreeing. “This guy’s hair is incredible, though. How does it even do that?”

Ryuko lifted her hands from Nonon’s waist, putting them into the classic five-dollar foot-long position before she said, “Aliens.”

Nonon cackled, and she nestled herself more comfortably against Ryuko. “Your fingers are supposed to be spread apart,” she said, and Ryuko fixed their position.

“Look at you, you fucking meme expert,” she teased, hands holding their positions for another beat before settling back on Nonon’s hips.

“Well, it comes with living with the Dog,” Nonon said. She placed her own hands over Ryuko’s, twined them together, and Ryuko squeezed them in response. She heard Satsuki open the door, start speaking with the delivery person. “Am I really going to eat pizza without a shirt on? Is this what my life’s come to?”

Ryuko shrugged. “You’re free to go get your clothes if you’re that uncomfortable,” she said. “But I mean, you have less of a chance to get grease stains when you have nothing to stain.”

Nonon paused. As she considered what she said, she heard the clink of coins and the rustle of paper bills at the entrance, the slam of a door after a muted farewell. “You’ve got a point,” she finally said, as Satsuki got back to the couch and set the pizza on the coffee table. She barely even blinked at the continued state of Nonon’s undress, instead opening the pizza box and passing a piece to each of the women, who had to quickly untangle their fingers. Both of them flushed with embarrassment at Satsuki’s knowing smirk.

“Eyebrows,” Ryuko said through her pizza, “can we please change the channel?”

“No,” was her immediate response, glancing over at Ryuko as if she had suggested that she should punch herself in the face instead.

Ryuko groaned, frustrated. “I don’t wanna hear any more about how Atlantic sunk because some alien fucked something up or some shit,” she said before practically wolfing down the rest of her pizza.

“I’m on Shithead with this one, actually,” Nonon said. “Give me the remote, Satsuki. It’s a majority vote.”

“That’s where you’re wrong, Jakazure!” Satsuki stood, clenching the remote in one hand. “This is no democracy!”

“Satsuki, we’re in America what are you even saying--”

“I refuse!”

“This isn’t even your own house! This is my house!”

Satsuki replied to her her by frowning and shoving the remote in her pants, face as still as stone. Ryuko immediately tossed her head back and roared with laughter, stopping only from the combined efforts of both Nonon’s and Satsuki’s glares.

“I can get the remote back,” Ryuko said, finishing off her piece of pizza before lifting Nonon from her lap and setting her down beside her on the couch. “Watch and learn, Troll Doll, this is how you tame a Kiryuin.”

Nonon lifted a brow, obviously doubtful. “Just don’t complain to me when you reach for another slice of pizza and it’s gone cold,” she said.

“The fuck are you saying, cold pizza’s the bomb, I’m not gonna complain about that,” Ryuko answered, wrinkling her nose at her, before turning her attention back to Satsuki. She glanced, not-so-subtly, at her pants. “Happy to see me, Eyebrows?” She asked, slinking forwards.

Satsuki let out a humorless snort in response, absently leaning towards Ryuko, who toyed with the buttons of her dress shirt.

“I was trying to imply that you’ve got a boner for me,” Ryuko added, moving ever closer in order for her to nose at her pulse point. Satsuki went rigid at the touch and she let out a shaky breath, but the slight inclination of her head to give her more access to her neck assured Ryuko that she didn’t want her to pull away.

“I got that joke, thank you,” Satsuki said, “but I’d imagine if I had a penis I would be able to control my erections.”

“Oh, through sheer willpower?” Ryuko asked, popping open the first two buttons of Satsuki’s blouse. She glanced up at Satsuki and shifted higher to kiss her jaw before moving ever higher and kissing at the corner of her mouth. “Just yell at your dick until they went away?”

Satsuki hummed, turning her head in order to kiss her full on the mouth, the hands that had been resting at her side finding themselves on Ryuko’s hips. Ryuko unbuttoned her shirt the rest of the way and Satsuki let out a gasp against her lips when the backs of her knuckles brushed her stomach.

“Jesus Christ,” Nonon hissed, “They fucking moved independent to each other.”

Ryuko laughed, kissing Satsuki again and helping her out of her shirt. She found her neck again, glancing over at Nonon and biting down there. “She likes it when she’s watched,” Ryuko said, tugging at Satsuki’s belt loops. “I’m convinced it’s because she’s a narcissist.”

“Big word, Shithead. Good job,” Nonon said, although it had no bite. She clutched at the seat of the couch, mouth half-open, brows furrowed. Ryuko just sucked at Satsuki’s neck, still staring at Nonon.

“You sure do know how to make a girl special,” Ryuko shot back, smirking when all the other woman could do was open and close her mouth, struggling to find a comeback. She turned her attention back to Satsuki, thumbs brushing over her hipbones. “You should show your abs off more often, Eyebrows. It’s nice hearing nothing from the Pink Terror over there.”

Instead of a response, Ryuko got Satsuki glancing over at the television.

“Are you fucking kidding me right now?” Ryuko asked.

Satsuki lifted a brow and let out a distracted, “Pardon?”

“Oh my God, I’m being spurned for a fucking television show about aliens building pyramids and shit,” she complained, throwing her hands up in the air.

“There’s only fifteen minutes left, let me just watch the rest,” she said. Ryuko whined, pressing all her weight against her, forehead slamming against her collarbone. Satsuki let out a surprised grunt but took only a step back in response.

“Eyebrows,” Ryuko grunted, slinging her arms across her shoulders and burying her face against her neck.

“No,” Satsuki said.

“What no, I haven’t even said anything,” Ryuko said, snapping her bra straps. Satsuki didn’t even flinch, and Ryuko let out a disappointed sigh.

“Shithead, I don’t think you’re doing that great a job of taming a Kiryuin,” Nonon piped up. “Just take the remote out of her pants, it’s not like she’s fucking guarding it.”

“No, it’s like. It’s like a trigger,” Ryuko said. She lifted her head and glanced over at Nonon, then furrowed her brows at what she had just finished saying. “Not the. The uh, the PTSD one, the horror game one. Like, when you pick up a key in a room and a monster spawns or some jumpscare happens.”

“Did you just call your girlfriend a horror game?”

“Well, have you looked at her?” Ryuko asked, and Satsuki whacked her in the head. Ryuko bit her neck in response, rocked against her. Her thigh knocked against the remote and Satsuki let out a quiet, surprised gasp in response. “Troll Doll,” Ryuko called out, “how adverse are you to me getting Satsuki off with the remote in her pants?”

Ryuko didn’t have time to hear an answer, because Satsuki’s grip on her hips tightened and she suddenly found herself on the floor. “I just want to hear the end of the theory.” She hesitated. “To hear how stupid it is, of course.”

Ryuko lay there, prone, with Satsuki sitting on her waist, and she lifted her arms above her head in surrender. “Jesus, fine. I’m not gonna fight you over a remote.”

Satsuki lifted a brow, surprised. “ _You’re_ not going to fight someone over something stupid? I do believe that’s how I met you.”

Ryuko turned away, flushing. “Well. Get two beers in me and I might think about it.”

She just tugged at the fringe of her undershirt, thumbs dipping under the fabric to press at her hipbones just as Ryuko had done to her. “You called me Satsuki,” she said, after a moment.

Ryuko coughed and found a sudden interest in the ceiling, trying to ignore the fingers dancing on her ribs. Satsuki’s hands moved higher, lingering on her chest for a moment to give her breasts a squeeze -which made Ryuko gasp and meet Satsuki’s stare- before shifting up to her face. She smoothed out one of her brows with one hand, her other one brushing over her lips. Ryuko sighed and kissed her palm, leaning into the touch. Her eyes slipped shut and she let out a quiet murmur of approval when both her hands drifted to thumb at the shells of her ears. Their noses brushed against each other. Ryuko wasn’t sure exactly who closed the distance between their lips, but they were kissing again, Ryuko clutching at the back of her neck in order to tug her closer. She groaned against Satsuki’s mouth, opening her own and scratching at her scalp.

“You’re supposed to be studying, you shouldn’t even be watching this,” Ryuko said as soon as they broke away. “Gimme the fucking remote.” Satsuki frowned down at her. Ryuko stared back, completely unaffected by the intensity of her expression. Ryuko squished her face between the palms of her hands. “Settle down,” she said.

She stared at her for a moment longer before letting out a resigned sigh and sitting up. She handed her the remote. “Fine. I’ll just study, then. I’ve no idea when you’ve gotten so serious about my studies.”

Ryuko laughed at her petulance, sat up and landed a quick kiss to her lips. “Jesus, tone it down a little,” she said, pressing another, smaller kiss to the corner of her lips.

“I appreciate being called Jesus, but I thought _you_ were the reincarnation of him. I don’t want to steal your thunder.”

Ryuko smacked her in the shoulder. “Shut the fuck up,” she said, grinning. “Hey, Troll Doll, she’s bullying me. Protect your girlfriend’s honor.”

Nonon just snorted at her and shrugged helplessly.

“I don’t think she’s coming to your rescue,” Satsuki mused.

“Never trust a short person,” Ryuko said. “I should have listened to Randy Newman.”

“Well, he’s short, too,” Satsuki said.

She pursed her lips. “Catch-22.”

“You’re full of big words today, Shithead.”

“I wasn’t talking to you!” Ryuko frowned in Nonon’s direction. “All full of words now, huh? Gonna bully me, too?”

“Maybe,” she countered, grinning when Ryuko just grunted. “Hey, while you’re still getting all dirty by sitting on the floor, think you could pass me my shirt?”

Ryuko blinked at her, still frowning. Nonon sighed.

“Satsuki, stop bullying my girlfriend,” she said, resigned.

“Well, I have studying to do anyway,” Satsuki said, standing up. She picked up her shirt and folded it before placing it on the coffee table and making her way back to the sofa.

Ryuko scoffed and reached over to grab Nonon’s sweater before she got up.

“No bra?” Nonon asked as Ryuko sat down and handed the article of clothing to her.

“You’re among friends, why would you even need one,” Ryuko said. “Plus I mean. It’s your house. Who wears a bra in their own house?”

“Whatever,” she mumbled, pulling the sweater on. “Have your pizza.”

“Oh, right,” Ryuko said, leaning forward and grabbing a slice. She folded the piece and took a bite out of it, then scrambled with the television remote and changed the channel to the Discovery channel. “Back-to-back How It’s Made, alright. Now it’s a party, am I right?”

Satsuki glared at her from behind her notebook.

“Oh my God,” Ryuko mumbled, shifting over to place a hand on her knee. When Satsuki shifted away, she lifted her hand and instead said, “I’m sorry. Fuck, you want me to change it back?”

She glanced at Ryuko, then back at the screen. “No. It’s alright. I want to see how they make folding bicycles.” She relaxed and reached over in order to tug at Ryuko’s ear. “Thank you for asking.”

“Well, there’s only like. Ten minutes left of the show, I would have been able to survive that much bullshit.”

“You’ve just been forgiven, I wouldn’t push it,” Satsuki said, shifting her attention back to her notes.

Ryuko rolled her eyes. “Noted,” she said, suddenly pulling her phone from her pocket and typing something in. “I’m not actually making a note, by the way, just thought of something I need to check out-- oh my god it’s like a _raspberry_ , I’m never eating raspberries ever again,” she said, paling.

“What the hell did you search-- oh my God, Shithead, what the fuck is wrong with you?” Nonon recoiled as soon as she had glanced over.

“I needed to see what it looked like!”

“Shithead. A prolapsed asshole isn’t something anyone needs to see.”

Ryuko stared at the picture for a few moments longer before she frowned and closed the app. “Yeah. Probably.” She sighed and flopped over, placing her head on Nonon’s lap. “Hey, you.”

Nonon glanced down at her. “What. Don’t say anything about that picture, I don’t want to hear it.”

Ryuko shut her mouth, obviously about to say something about the picture. “What the hell, no, I wasn’t going to say anything about that. I was going to ask why you aren’t called, like, Yesyes or something.”

“Shut the fuck up.”

“Alright,” Ryuko answered easily. Nonon sighed and ran her fingers through her hair, and Ryuko turned over on her side in order to watch TV properly.

“Just letting you know that the only reason I’m playing with your hair is so that I can wipe the pizza grease off my fingers,” Nonon said.

“Can’t be working very well, my hair’s greasy enough as it is,” Ryuko answered, reaching over to grab Nonon’s unoccupied hand. “Here, lemme lick the grease off your fingers.”

Nonon flicked her nose and Ryuko retaliated with a nip to one of her fingers.

“Fine, reject my kind offer,” Ryuko mumbled.

“I will, thanks,” Nonon replied. She pinched the bridge of Ryuko’s nose, who let out an indignant huff in response. “Your streak’s fading, by the way. Satsuki and I are getting our hair done next Saturday, you should come with us.”

“Can’t, Tsumugu’s got me training like, all day next Saturday. Says I’ve been slacking, which is sort of the biggest piece of bullshit I’ve ever heard in my life,” she explained, grabbing Nonon’s hand and placing it on her head to join the other hand. She busied her own fingers with one of Nonon’s garters. “Can one of you give me a lift, though? You can come visit me after you’re done so I can see your rad new hair styles.”

Nonon glanced over at Satsuki, who shrugged and nodded. “We can use my car, it’s better on gas. And I’ve been to your gym, those parking spots are absolutely minuscule,” Satsuki said.

“Great, thanks.” She was going to say more, until her phone started vibrating. She sat up and fished the phone out of her pocket, mumbling, “Who the fuck even is this...?” before she answered it. “Hullo? Yeah, speaking. The bike? Wait, you mean right now? Gimme a sec, please.” the please was an addition Ryuko chose at nearly the last second before she turned her attention to Nonon and Satsuki. “Hey, you know that motorbike I’ve been talking about? Well, the guy who’s selling it’s asking if I wanna buy the bike tonight. Can we go?”

Nonon and Satsuki looked over at each other, and nearly simultaneously, let out exasperated sighs. “I’ll drive, since you’re driving us next week,” Nonon said.

Ryuko let out a hoot and turned her attention back to the phone.

“Why do I have a terrible feeling about this,” Satsuki asked Nonon as she passed her by.

“Because it involves Ryuko and a potentially dangerous mode of transportation, that’s why,” Nonon answered, leaning over to place a kiss on her forehead. “Now let’s go, before Shithead over there pisses herself out of sheer excitement.”

 

 


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This second, and ultimately final part of the series only exists because thisarenotarealblog on tumblr is maybe the best friend and best supporter ever, and also because I thought this would be a nice b-day gift for him, even if it’s a few days late. Wish Robert a happy late birthday, and thank him for Saving This Fic.

The moment Ryuko rolled off the couch, she was trembling with excitement. “I’m gonna get a motorbike, you guys,” she said, tugging Satsuki to her feet and pulling her in for a quick kiss. She bent down to place one on Nonon’s lips, too, and Nonon just patted her face and told her to “shut the fuck up and calm down because she looked like a stupid puppy.” Ryuko just huffed and made her way to the exit. “I don’t even know why we’re together, all you do is make fun of me,” she said, slipping on her Nike flip flops. “I mean, Eyebrows does it too, but at least I can fuck her. I don’t even get that with you.”

Satsuki glanced down at her footwear. “I was hoping Uzu had left those here.”

Ryuko lifted her foot and followed Satsuki’s gaze. “What? What’s wrong with these?”

Satsuki blinked. “We can’t be partners anymore. I’m sorry it has to be like this,” she said. “I don’t deserve to be in a relationship where my girlfriend doesn’t even realize that wearing socks and Nike flip flops are terrible. I’m a good person. Why is this happening to me?”

“Well, Nike flip flops on their own are pretty bad to begin with,” Nonon added in.

Satsuki nodded. “Yes. That’s right.” She looked over at Nonon, sent her a flash of a smile that Nonon flushed at. “Well, it’s decided. I’m only dating Nonon now.”

Ryuko pursed her lips. “I can still get a ride to see the bike though, right?” She paused, opened her phone, and added, "Here, lemme send you the address, Nonon."

Satsuki sighed and rubbed her forehead as Nonon plugged in the location for directions. When Ryuko just grinned, Satsuki reached over and tweaked her ear. Ryuko smacked her hand away, triggering a moderately intense slapping fight between the two of them. They stopped only when Nonon opened the door and threatened that she'd drive off without them if they didn't stop. Ryuko walked between Satsuki and Nonon, deliberately bumping shoulders with them every other step and still bouncing with excitement. Nonon practically shoved Ryuko into the elevator, acting like some overworked business mom with her kid she didn't know how to handle. Satsuki stepped in next to Ryuko, bemused at the display, and since she was closest to the buttons, pressed the one for the lobby.

“You think we’ll fit in your car, Nonon?” Ryuko asked, grinning. “It’s a little on the small side.”

Nonon just rolled her eyes and led the two outside, pulling her keys from her jacket pocket. “Maybe you’d both fit if you weren’t so…” she paused, grimacing at the word choice she was about to make, and finished with a rather lame, “Fit.”

Ryuko let out a loud, coughing bark of laughter at Nonon’s expense, the sound echoing within the tight space of the elevator. Nonon flinched at the sharp sound and smacked Ryuko’s arm, flushing.

“Shut up,” she said, as Ryuko continued to cackle. “It wasn’t even that funny.”

“No, I know,” Ryuko said, sobering up as the elevator doors opened. “You’re like, the opposite of funny. Sometimes I think you’ve got even more of a stick up your ass than Eyebrows over there.” She jerked a thumb in the direction of Satsuki, who raised her brows, shocked.

“Me? I am the essence of funny,” Satsuki said. “If I’m not, then who needs a sense of humour at all, really.”

Ryuko grinned, smacking a wet, deliberately loud kiss on Satsuki’s cheek. Satsuki looked down at her, as if to say ‘okay, don’t push your luck,’ but Ryuko decided to completely ignore the stare and went back to speaking.  “Look at you, all loose and joking. What a transformation.” She hooked her arm around her shoulder as they stepped out of the elevator together. “See, Nonon, with my patented ‘Date Me, Ryuko, Easily the Most Laid-Back Person Ever 12-Step Plan,’ we can get even the biggest sticklers for boring shit all un-sticklered.”

Nonon only scoffed. “Remind me to stop dating you at the end of this night.”

Satsuki, however, decided to play along. “What are the other eleven steps, since I’m assuming one of them is just… Date you.”

Ryuko paused, giving it some thought, fingers toying with the material of Satsuki’s jacket. “Steps two through twelve are all just ‘chill.’”

Satsuki snorted and shoved Ryuko, who just tightened her grip around her shoulders into a headlock and furiously rubbed her other hand’s knuckles against Satsuki’s head. Satsuki just sighed and took it until Ryuko loosened her grip. She ‘accidentally’ knocked her head into Ryuko’s chin. Ryuko yelped, teeth clacking together, but before she could make any retaliating move, Nonon had stepped between them.

“Like fucking children,” Nonon grumbled. “Listen, if I catch you two acting like a pair of gross fighting brothers again, I’m gonna run you over and put you outta your collective miseries.”

Ryuko opened her mouth to argue, but Nonon only left the building, one arm raised above her head, clicking her key’s buttons. The hummer’s lights flashed in response as Ryuko and Satsuki followed after her. 

“By the way, Matoi,” Satsuki said, opening the front door and climbing in as Ryuko reluctantly took the back seat, “Your twelve step program sounds like a con.”

Ryuko scoffed. “Never said it’d  _ cost _ anything.”

“Maybe our sanity,” Nonon muttered, as she turned the key in the ignition, starting the car.

“What?” Ryuko asked, over the noise of the engine.

“Nothing,” Nonon dismissed. “Put your seatbelt on.”

Ryuko huffed like a petulant twelve year old. “Fine. You guys make out and now you have a bond, I get it.”

Nonon sputtered, half scandalized, half amused. “We’ve  _ always _ had a bond, right Satsuki?”

“Oh, yes,” Satsuki answered, smiling. Ryuko groaned, exasperated, and leaned back in her seat to distance herself from the two of them. 

“You’re lucky that the back seats here are comfortable and spacious, or else I’d be complaining,” she said as Nonon pulled out of her parking spot.

“Oh, so what you’ve been doing hasn’t been complaining?” Nonon glanced over her shoulder. “I shudder at the thought of something worse than this.”

“Matoi, do you have the money on you?” Satsuki interrupted. “Or do we have to stop by at an ATM?”

At the mention of the motorbike, Ryuko started bouncing in her seat with excitement again. "I've had the money on me since I saw the ad." She grinned and fiddled with the zipper of her leather jacket. "Holy shit, I'm so excited."

Nonon and Satsuki looked at each other as though they were exasperated parents, but Ryuko was still too distracted at the prospect of a new toy for her to even notice. Ryuko reached out and rested her arms around the headrest in front of her, hands stretching even further to prod at Satsuki.

Satsuki only leaned back and let her pat her face, thumbs occasionally stroking her cheekbones. Ryuko’s hands slid down her face to rest on her shoulders, and she leaned forward to lean on the back of the passenger chair.

Nonon glanced at the two of them as she stopped at a stop sign. "Shithead, do you have your seatbelt on?"

Ryuko jerked up from her position, face squashed against the armrest. "Yes," she lied, as she reached back to fumble with the safety precaution in question. Nonon just breaked sharply and Ryuko slammed her face against the passenger seat she was already about two inches away from. Nonon glanced over to grin at her and Ryuko sneered in response, punctuating her glare with a resounding click of her seat belt. Satsuki reached back in order to scratch behind her ears, and Ryuko only sighed and leaned against the car seat again, pacified. She kissed her wrist and stroked at her collarbones, shutting her eyes.

Nonon glanced over at her phone, checking the directions one more time. “Where’d you even find this guy?”

Ryuko grunted. “Craigslist.” She reached over, plucked at Nonon’s hair, who swatted her hand away. “Been tryin’ to meet with this guy for ages.”

Nonon snorted. “Ages?”

“Two days,” Satsuki clarified, smiling when Ryuko made an indignant noise and smacked her shoulder. “I’m only being honest.”

“Two days is a long time,” Ryuko grumbled, letting Satsuki continue to scratch at her scalp. “You could almost die of thirst in two days. You’re like, two thirds of the way there.”

Satsuki snorted. “This just in,” she said, “getting a motorcycle is as important as water.”

“That’s a universal fact, now,” Nonon said, waiting until the last possible minute to turn into a driveway and jostling the two other people in the car. “Okay,” she added, braking harshly, “we’re here.”

Ryuko glanced over Satsuki’s headrest. “Wow,” she started. “This place is a shithole.”

Ryuko definitely was not wrong about the place being a shithole, the most surprising thing about her statement being that it came from her of all people. Nonon and Satsuki let out quiet noises of agreement, unbuckling their seatbelts. Ryuko only unbuckled hers once Satsuki opened the door for her, and she lifted her head, slow.

Satsuki stared down at her. “Are you even breathing?”

Ryuko shook her head.

“You should probably do that,” Satsuki said.

Ryuko nodded, took in the most unnatural-looking breath Satsuki had ever seen, and stepped out of the hummer. Satsuki clapped her on the back and Ryuko nearly fell forward from the force of the blow, all of the wind knocked out of her. She gasped for breath and glared up at the offender, who only smirked and said, “There. Now you’re breathing.”

Ryuko huffed and nudged her shoulder with her own. “Thanks, though.” She reached out and curled her index and middle finger around Satsuki’s pinky. Satsuki only hummed, and they caught up to Nonon.

The lawn was alternating brown and yellow, dry and unkempt. “You’d think Jigsaw or some shit would live here,” Nonon said, letting Ryuko step ahead of her to ring the doorbell. The house, while the largest on the block by a long shot, was also the one in the worst state of disrepair in probably the whole neighborhood. Did the electricity even work in this place?

Instead of the door opening, the intercom next to it crackled. That answered the last question. The voice cleared their throat before asking, in a deep but reedy voice, “Hello?”

“Uh, yeah, hi,” Ryuko answered.

“You here for the bike?”

Ryuko nodded. After a moment of realizing that the person behind the intercom couldn’t see her, she said, “Yeah, the one and only.”

The voice grunted. “Meet me on the right side of the house, in front of the garage.”

“Oh, uh,” Ryuko said, but the intercom had already cut off. “I’m going to be murdered.” She turned to Nonon and Satsuki, grimacing, brows drawn tight together. “This is a murder house.”

Nonon laughed and clapped her on the shoulder. “Calm down! You’re strong, and Satsuki’s strong. If anything, I’d be the one who’ll die.”

That did nothing to calm Ryuko down, and she grabbed Nonon’s shoulders, stare intense. “Stay behind me and Satsuki.”

Nonon shrugged Ryuko’s hands off and rolled her eyes. “Jesus Christ, Ryuko, calm the fuck down.”

Satsuki just tugged the two of them along. “Just listen to Matoi, Nonon.”

Nonon sighed. “Fine. I’ll humor her.”

“Good,” Satsuki said, leading them towards the side of the building. “You know how she gets when she doesn’t have her way.”

Nonon grimaced. “So whiny.”

Ryuko glared at Nonon, almost-nearly pouting. “Pot calling the kettle black! Like you don’t whine all the time,” she said, nudging in front of the pack, hands as deep in her pockets as they allowed.

Nonon scoffed. “I’m cute when I complain. You just look like an ogre.”

Ryuko let out a falsetto screech at that, which grew into a yelp once they turned the house’s corner and came nearly face-to-face with a five and a half foot tall pile of hair. “Holy shit!” She added for good measure, shoulders up to her ears.

“What my compatriot meant to say is that it’s a pleasure to meet you, sir,” Satsuki said, apparently not at all perturbed that she was talking to a massive dust bunny.

“Hrm. Quite alright,” the aforementioned dust bunny said, leaning forward on his cane. “‘Fore we get started, folks, do we have the money with us?”

Ryuko reached into her ass pocket and pulled out her wallet, nodding slowly. She opened it and flashed the cash without ever tearing her gaze from the man in front of her.

He was an amalgamation of hair, skin, and what looked to be some sort of woolen tunic. He scanned the bills Ryuko fanned out, then grunted and tottered along to his garage. “Alright folks, I’m gonna say this one time: I’ve got a nasty fucking trio of ferrets in here, so keep your disgusting toddler hands to yourselves. Don’t wanna see any of you pinchin’ anything.”

Ryuko leaned over to Nonon and Satsuki and hissed, “Is that a fake accent?”

Satsuki only nodded, barely keeping her composure. “He keeps on changing the inflection,” she answered, brows furrowing.

Nonon didn’t even bother paying attention to Ryuko’s question. “Did he just call us babies?”

Ryuko coughed, trying to hold in a laugh. “Well, with you here, I understand why he’d be confused.” Satsuki gave her a warning elbow and Ryuko lifted her hands up in surrender.

“Uh, sir?” Ryuko asked as the man strained to lift the garage door. “Do you… Do you need any help?”

The man spun on his feet, massive wiry brows furrowing. Ryuko took two steps back. He stared at her, bloodshot eyes straining, plucking at the hairs on his beard. “Y’got big arms. Go ahead, kid, do your worst.” He tapped his cane against Ryuko’s shin with a soft, meaty  _ thwack _ , and Ryuko grit her teeth and did as he asked.

She did not go there to get heckled by some old carpet with an odor problem, but that carpet was her ticket to her new ride, so she squared her shoulders and decided she’d have to put up with him. As she leaned over, he said, “Nice form, jackass,” and Ryuko funneled all of her rage towards lifting the garage door and getting her stupid bike. The door lifted with minimal effort, which meant that either Shaggy Gone Wrong over there — who Ryuko was about 80% sure was currently staring at her ass, the fucking creep— was weak as Hell or just wanted an excuse to have someone else do it for him. When he whacked her with his cane, only a little harder than gently, Ryuko still wasn’t sure about the answer. 

It didn’t make her any less infuriated.

The garage smelled like ferrets, frito chips, and a little like death itself had paid him and his weasels a visit.

Was it worth it? Was this bike worth it? Ryuko asked herself as she took her first step into the room and was slapped by its odour. She added some low tones of raw garlic to the mix of smells, nose wrinkling.

Nonon didn’t even bother going inside, which Ryuko, in retrospect, should have probably done. It was too late, now. She’d probably have to fumigate all of her clothes four times to get the smell out. “You sure one of your three ferrets isn’t dead?” Nonon asked.

The man tutted. “If he was, It’d be too late to recover the body. Buncha cannibals, these guys,” he said, affection in his tone.

Satsuki cleared her throat, catching his attention. Her body was straight, brows drawn tight, the very picture of polite impatience. Ryuko loved her all over again. “Sir, your motorcycle?”

“Right, yeah,” he said, hopping over a box or three to reach the very end of the room. “C’mon, Biceps, I’m gonna need your help.”

Again, she thought, Was this worth it? Was this really, really worth it?

Before her mind could come up with a decision, Satsuki had stepped forward. “I’ll help,” she said, touching the small of Ryuko’s back. “I don’t want you to get your foot stabbed by some rogue sharp object. There’s a reason sandals are banned from hospitals, Matoi,” she whispered to Ryuko, completely serious. “Now go and reflect on the life choices that brought you here, I’ll get your motorbike.”

“My hero,” Ryuko said, tone bordering on earnest. Satsuki smiled and smacked her ass on her way past her, and Ryuko yelped, reflexively swatting at her hand.

The Walking Dustbin looked Satsuki up and down, halfheartedly tugging at what Ryuko assumed was part of the motorbike. “You got muscles, kid?”

Satsuki only nodded.

He grunted, punctuating the sound with another tug. “Well, get on with using ‘em!”

Satsuki looked back at Ryuko and Nonon, one brow raised, then shrugged. “Move aside, sir,” Satsuki said, shuffling around the junk pile in her way. “This is it?”

“Yup,” he said, wiping the nonexistent sweat from his brow. Satsuki just hummed, leaned over, and, in one good pull, got the motorbike between her arms and out of the garbage. She huffed and set it down. The man had his arms crossed like a petulant child. “Well, I loosened it for ya.”

“That you did,” Satsuki said, wheeling it over to Ryuko, who barely even registered her presence once she laid eyes on the bike. When Ryuko didn’t say anything, Nonon took it upon herself to ask the proper questions for her.

“This baby all loaded up with gas?” She asked, taking a step forward despite the smell. “... Does it even work?”

The man hobbled over to the bike, then looked at Nonon. And continued to look at her. After about twenty seconds of silence, he shrugged and said, “I’ve got no fuckin’ clue. You folks are on your own for that shit. Never said it worked in the ad.”

That snapped Ryuko out of her reverie, and her gaze immediately shifted from bike to man. “If this bike doesn’t work, I’ll probably get super upset. If I get upset, my girlfriends might do something stupid, like getting their bandmates to run you over or something. You seem like a nice enough dude, so it better work.” She paused, then added, “Also I do mixed martial arts and I could probably beat your ass.”

The man looked completely unphased. “Yeah, yeah. That’s what my ex-wife said. Sure, she took everything from me in the divorce, but I rose up stronger, turned my back on Hell.” He tugged at his beard. “My ex-wife is Hell in this metaphor.” He plucked a hair from his beard, humming thoughtfully, then plucked two more for good measure. Ryuko and Nonon flinched. “Actually, she’s sort of Hell in real life, too.”

The three women exchanged glances, and Ryuko jerked her head in the direction of Nonon’s hummer. There was no way she was going to listen to this dude talk about how much he hated his ex-wife.

Nonon took a very dramatic look at her watch at let out the worst actor’s laugh. “Ha ha! Oh, look at the time! Sorry, man, but we’ve really gotta go. Satsuki over here’s got like, ten episodes of uh… Ancient Aliens to watch, and you know how it is.”

The man grunted, looking at Satsuki appraisingly. “I understand. Well, hand over the Benjamins and I won’t hold you three any longer.”

Ryuko nodded. “They’re that weird guy with the hair on the twenties, actually.”

“Andrew Jackson,” Satsuki piped in.

“Right, yeah, that guy,” she said, pulling her wallet out again and handing him the bills. He counted through them one last time. “We good?”

He grunted and nodded. “Yeah. Key’s in the ignition. Now get the fuck outta here. This is private property.”

The three of them at least had the decency to keep from laughing until they were safe in the car.

“That was, by far, the fuckin’ weirdest guy I’ve ever met in my entire life,” Ryuko managed to say in between bouts of hysterical laughter. “He wasn’t consistent! What kind of a persona was he trying to keep up?!”

“Who the fuck even knows,” Nonon answered, trying to start the engine. "Talking about ‘This is private property,’ who the fuck does he think he is?”

“Did either of you see the three ferrets, because I didn’t,” Satsuki asked, turning in the passenger seat to look over at Ryuko.

“God I hope they’re not… Dead or anything,” Ryuko said, sobering up at the thought pretty quickly. “Way to ruin the mood, Eyebrows.”

Satsuki snorted. “Oh? We’ve gone back to Eyebrows, now?” She asked, quirking one of her namesakes.

Ryuko flushed. “Yes. Yeah,” She mumbled, glancing away from her. She heard Satsuki snort again, this time more good-natured, and Ryuko glanced back in time to watch her pull the passenger seat back and lean the backing to its full extension, practically crushing Ryuko’s thighs. “Ow!” she yelped, flinching.

Satsuki quickly adjusted her seat, lifting the back a mere two or three inches off her leg. “Oh, sorry, I meant that to be a little smoother than—”

“Smooth? I’m trying to think of a scenario where that would be smooth, and I’m comin’ up about as empty as that motorbike’s fuel tank is.” Still, she grinned down at Satsuki, who reached up and placed her hand on her cheek.

“I was trying to pretend to lie my head in your lap,” she explained, brushing her thumb over Ryuko’s cheekbone, who leaned against the touch and scoffed.

“Way to be cute, crushing your girlfriend's legs like that,” she answered, resting her elbows on Satsuki's headrest. “It just screams adorable, really.”

“Well, with my chair on your legs,” Satsuki started, tone dropping down to what could be described as sexy but scary levels, “I could make you scream anything I wanted.”

They stared at each other, as serious as serious could get, before Ryuko coughed, trying to hold in a laugh. “That was about five percent hot and ninety five percent fucking terrifying,” she said. Satsuki flashed her teeth at her in what could only in theory be called a smile. 

“Hey, love birds,” Nonon said, looking over at the two of them. “You're violating vehicle safety. I'm gonna have to call the police and turn you in.”

Ryuko huffed. “Keep your eyes on the road, narc,” she shot back. “Look how loose and fun Satsu-- I mean, Eyebrows is.”

“Yeah, narc,” Satsuki said, eyes closed, preening at Ryuko's touches. “I'm wild and free and cannot be tamed by any man,” she added, cracking one eye open and smiling. She considered what she just said, added, “Perhaps by a woman. …Or better yet,  _ women _ .” She reached her hand out for Nonon, who, after a moment’s hesitation, took hold of it. Satsuki did the same for Ryuko, who twined their fingers together and sighed.

“Hey, Nonon,” Ryuko said.

“I can’t take both hands off the steering wheel and I don’t have three hands, so you’ll just have to deal with holding onto just Satsuki’s,” Nonon answered, not waiting for the rest of her question.

Ryuko chortled but shook her head. “No, not that.” When Nonon glanced over at Ryuko, brow raised inquisitively, she continued, “I was wondering if we could stop by a gas station and I could take my bike for a test drive.”

“Oh,” Nonon said. “Yeah, sure. I think we passed one on the way here.”

“Okay. cool.” She wiped her free hand on her sweater. “I do sorta want to hold your hand now, though,” Ryuko added.

Ryuko could tell Nonon was grinning by the way her ears perked up, even with her looking away. “Well, tough noogies.” When she glanced over and caught Ryuko pouting, she smirked and took another sharp right, crossing over two lanes and not taking the time to even look in her blind spot. Ryuko let out a choked cough as her chest hit the limits of her seatbelt, her hand held in Satsuki's vicegrip.

“Nonon, seriously, have you even ever gotten your license or are you illegal?” Ryuko demanded, leaning back in her seat to release the lock on her seatbelt.

“I don't know what you're talking about,” she responded, switching into the other lane to pass the car in front of her. “I'm a model driver.”

"For  _ Speed Racer _ , maybe," Ryuko scoffed, settling back on her elbows and looking down at Satsuki, brows furrowed. Satsuki stared back at her, and Ryuko brought her free hand to her face, thumbing at her chin. Satsuki only frowned in response, her own thumb pressing against the heel of Ryuko’s hand she was holding onto. 

Nonon either chose to ignore her comment or was too focused to keep herself from getting into an accident while still doing whatever the fuck she pleased on the road, and Ryuko was leaning more toward the latter reason from the way her brows were knitted, small hand gripping the steering wheel white-knuckled. “Satsuki, fix your seat, the gas station’s a few seconds away,” Nonon said, taking a sharp right turn. Ryuko barely managed to keep her head from slamming against the car window. Satsuki did as she asked with a resigned sigh, letting go of both of their hands in order to bring her seat up. Nonon took up two parking spaces, put the car in park, then turned in her seat to glance over at Ryuko.

“I’ll pay for your first ride if you want,” she said, pulling her keys from the ignition.

“I knew having a rich girlfriend would come in handy,” Ryuko answered with a teasing grin, leaning forward to plant a quick kiss on Nonon’s lips. Nonon scoffed and shoved her shoulder, fingers lingering on rough leather. Her touch shifted lower, curling around Ryuko’s biceps, tugging her forward for another kiss, this one less chaste than the last. Ryuko smiled into it when she felt Satsuki’s fingers at her neck, and she broke away to let her kiss Nonon, her own mouth finding the skin below Nonon’s ear and pressing her mouth there. Ryuko rested her hand on the median between driver and passenger seat, only to fall further forward when her hand slipped into a king-sized cup holder, practically headbutting Satsuki in the process with a dull  _ thunk _ . 

Ryuko mumbled an apology. Satsuki only kissed her temple in response before shifting away and opening the passenger seat door. Ryuko followed after her, fumbling with the car’s lock until Nonon unlocked it for her. She grunted her thanks as she hopped out, closing the door behind her with a bump of her hips. The car wasn’t completely off; even through the car’s doors, Ryuko could hear Nonon turning up her classical music, taking advantage of them not being in the car anymore.

Satsuki pressed her knuckles at the base of Ryuko’s scalp, and her attention turned from car back to the woman previously in the passenger seat of said car. Satsuki’s thumb stroked her neck, and her fingers uncurled to bury themselves in the mess that was her hair. Ryuko leaned into the touch. Satsuki’s finger tapped at the side of her head, and Ryuko obligingly turned to face her. They kissed, barely touching lips, before Ryuko shifted away and grinned, teasing. Satsuki lifted a brow and leaned forward; her second brow joined the first one as Ryuko grinned and shifted back again.

“You,” Satsuki started, but she stopped herself when the other woman shifted up against her. Ryuko’s index fingers curled around her two front belt loops, and she pulled Satsuki closer, still smiling.

“You smell like ferret piss,” Ryuko said, and Satsuki let out a surprised snort, closing the distance between them to press a more tangible kiss to her lips than the last one. Ryuko kissed her back, swiping her tongue against her lips, lazy, messy.

Satsuki tugged at her lower lip between her teeth. “You haven’t improved at all since we first met.” Ryuko huffed dismissively at her, thumbing at the hem of her pants.

Nonon slapped the hummer with the back of her hand. Ryuko and Satsuki jumped at the sudden noise, glancing over at her.

“Oh my God, you guys,” she said, and Ryuko’s shoulders shot up, ears already flushed. “Help me get your motorcycle out of my car before you two suck face in public.”

Satsuki, with an exaggerated, beleaguered sigh, pulled away from Ryuko, giving her scalp one last scritch. Ryuko leaned against the touch as she detangled her fingers from Satsuki’s belt loops. “Alright, Troll Doll,” she said, following Nonon to the trunk. As Nonon opened the door, The muted opera turned near-deafening compared to the silence of the rest of the gas station so late at night. Nonon didn’t even flinch, so Ryuko pretended she didn’t either. 

She touched at the small of Nonon’s back, the tips of her fingers tracing patterns on the fabric of her shirt and inching lower. She leaned over and kissed her temple as the trunk fully opened, and Nonon let out a quiet sigh. Nonon bumped into her with her shoulder, and Ryuko patted her ass with a sigh of her own.

Ryuko caught Satsuki watching her with what she assumed was mild contentedness. She smiled at her before turning her attention to her new in the trunk of Nonon’s car. “Look at our baby,” Ryuko said, whistful, eyes glazed over. “Isn’t she beautiful?”

Satsuki said, with only a moment’s pause and more than a lot of sarcasm, “Yes. Wonderful.”

Nonon shrugged and said, “Yeah, sure.”

Ryuko glared daggers at the two of them. “If you have any reservations, at least have the decency to not say them in front of the baby.”

Satsuki smiled at her, indulgent. “I can see the family resemblance in the flame decals.”

Nonon held in a snort and covered her mouth. Ryuko smacked her arm, and Nonon just barely held herself together in response, laughter splitting at the seams of her composure. “Just take your baby out and fill her with gasoline,” she said.

“What a way to treat an infant,” Satsuki said. “I knew you didn’t like babies, but I didn’t think infanticide was your end goal.”

Ryuko laughed an ugly guffaw of a laugh, so loud and phlegmy it almost sounded fake. The phlegm, unfortunately, was definitely not fake, and she had to turn away from Nonon and Satsuki to let out a wet, hacking cough and spit. “Oh, ew.”

“I’m sure this gas station’s cement has seen worse, Matoi,” Satsuki said, in some sort of attempt to reassure her.

Ryuko turned to her, wiping her mouth with the back of her hand, and said nothing. Instead, still embarrassed, she reached for her bike. With a grunt, she tugged it her way. Satsuki met her halfway, fingers brushing over Ryuko’s.

“Let me help, at least,” she said. Ryuko let her take one wheel while she took the other, and the two of them got it out of the van. “Your laugh was beautiful. Now go put your helmet on.”

Ryuko slowly turned her head in Satsuki’s direction. “... Helmet?”

Satsuki blinked. “Well, I know your skull’s thick, but you do need one.” She flipped the motorcycle’s kickstand open and let it stand by itself.

Ryuko groaned, rubbing her temples. Curse her for dating someone who actually cared about her wellbeing. “What if I go like, two miles an hour? Can I test drive it without a helmet at that speed?”

“Make it one point five and we’ve got a deal,” Satsuki answered. “Does that sound good to you, Nonon?”

Nonon shrugged. “Eh, it’s not like she’s got very many brain cells to kill to begin with if she crashes.”

Ryuko let out an offended huff. “Says the stoner.”

“Occasional and recreational marijuana user,” Nonon corrected.

Ryuko just rolled her eyes and nudged Nonon in response, who grinned and nudged her back in return.

Satsuki tapped her foot impatiently. Ryuko looked down at the foot, then slowly shifted her gaze upwards. 

“My eyes are down here,” Satsuki said, covering her eyebrows with one hand and trying to keep looking serious. “Stop that.”

“What, trying to make you laugh?” Ryuko reached over and patted Satsuki’s face with the flat of her palm. “Cool it, it’ll just be like, three minutes. I’ll go at point five miles an hour, does that sound good?”

Satsuki glanced away, Ryuko’s palm smushed against her mouth, her own hand still hiding her eyebrows. “Fine.” Ryuko leaned up on the tips of her toes to press a quick kiss to her lips. Satsuki hummed, the hand on her forehead instead finding the back of Ryuko’s neck. She pulled her into another kiss, smiling at Ryuko’s surprised gasp. Ryuko pressed her fingers against her stomach, fingers darting between the buttons of her blouse almost through muscle memory alone. The Pavlovian ab-touch?

“I’ll fill up the gas, then,” Nonon said, and Ryuko pulled away from Satsuki with about as much shame and embarrassment she could muster. At this point, there wasn’t very much of either emotion left for her  _ to _ muster. She watched as Nonon dislodged the kickstand and wheeled the bike over to the proper station.

Ryuko belatedly realized her fingers were still in Satsuki’s shirt. She found herself quite unmotivated to remove them. She felt Satsuki’s fingers curl around her wrist, thumb pressing against her pulse. For a brief moment, she was worried she’d pull her fingers out, but she didn’t. She just stroked at the skin there, her other hand shifting from neck to hip in order to tug her closer. It was weird; Ryuko didn’t have any other word for it, being held by one girlfriend while her other filled up her gas. Pampered, maybe, came to mind after that, but that wasn’t really why she felt strange. She thought about Sastuki punching her in the gut earlier, Sastuki offering to go into the Ferret Death Garage for her motorcycle instead of having Ryuko herself go. She thought of her orange skittles and her nutella with gummy worms.

“It’s different,” Ryuko said, almost without realizing, as she leaned back against Satsuki’s ever-solid frame, fingers toying with the fabric of her blouse. “It’s different, compared to being with her than with you.” Her voice was low, quiet, even though if she had spoken normally Nonon wouldn’t have been able to hear her that far away, anyway. “It’s not like… A bad thing. I like her a lot, I do,” she continued, her free hand at her side curling tight into a fist. “But I don’t think I like her like I love you.”

Satsuki didn’t say anything. Was she mad at her? Frustrated? Ryuko wasn’t sure if she’d be able to look at her in the silence, so she just watched Nonon fill up the gas. “Did you…” Satsuki started, but she didn’t continue, voice trailing off. “Do you still want to be with her?”

The question wasn’t what she’d been expecting. “No. Yeah. Yes. I’m pretty sure,” She grunts, leaning her head against Satsuki’s shoulder with a rough, sudden  _ thunk _ . “Not the same way I’m with you, though.”

Satsuki hummed, the hand at Ryuko’s hip tracing patterns Ryuko could feel even through the thick material of her leather jacket. Brass blared behind her, from the speakers of the hummer. Ryuko felt like she was in a foreign film, or at least watching one. Nonon dispensing gas into some wreck of a motorbike as Bach or some other old dead guy’s piece played in the background. Satsuki pressed her lips to her temple, and Ryuko sighed, turning her face to nudge her nose against her neck. “You’re telling her as soon as possible. I will not have you hurt her,” Satsuki said, finally. Her throat vibrated against Ryuko’s nose when she spoke, sending a sort of physical finality to the words.

“I will,” she answered. She was about to kiss her neck before Satsuki pulled away, the motion nearly sending her completely off-balance. She had moved back in order to stare at her, brows furrowed. “I will, Satsuki. I promise,” Ryuko said, firmer. Had she not said it with any conviction earlier? Satsuki’s lips quirked up like they did when she was satisfied with something, so Ryuko guessed she had said it right that time. Ryuko leaned forward again, and, with only a moment’s resistance on Satsuki’s end, kissed her jaw. 

Satsuki let go of her wrist and pressed her fingers to Ryuko’s neck, circling her two hickeys there at the base of it. “Good.” Satsuki said, staring down at her through her lashes. She cupped her jaw, traced her lower lip with her thumb, smiled when Ryuko turned to nip at her fingers. “I’m flattered to hear that you love me,” she said, smile grinning wider from teasing her.

Ryuko sputtered, the hand at the other woman’s stomach retracting to curl into a fist and bring down to the same place at her abs in a light punch. “Shuddup,” Ryuko muttered, glancing away. Satsuki let out a breathless sort of laugh, but the ugly kind instead of the refined kind.

Satsuki’s nose found Ryuko’s neck, then, still laughing quiet laughs as she leaned over. She brushed up against her pulse there, too, just as her hand had on her wrist. Her mouth pressed against her skin, raising every hair on the back of Ryuko’s scalp to attention. She shifted against the touch, a low, suddenly desperate groan at the back of her throat. Satsuki smiled, she could feel her lips curl against her skin, before she opened her mouth and bit down at her neck.

“Ow, Satsuki, what the fuck!?” Ryuko clapped her hand to her neck, brows furrowed. Satsuki moved back immediately, brows raised, hands releasing the younger woman. Ryuko managed to catch her wrists.

“I thought you liked biting,” Satsuki said, and Ryuko could catch the flush in her cheeks even in the low, unflattering light of the gas station. She looked away from her, glancing over at the empty street and the closed supermarket at the other side. “I distinctly remember you liking biting.”

“Well, yeah,” Ryuko admitted, shoulder rubbing up against the skin on her neck, “but you were being so gentle the whole time, it caught me like, super off-guard.” She let go of Satsuki’s wrists and gently smacked the flat of her stomach with the back of her hand. “You fuckin’ vampire, you.”

Satsuki blinked down at her, tilting her head in her direction in some sort of quiet apology. With her hands freed, she placed one on the side of Ryuko’s neck. Her fingers touched at where she had bitten her, thumb pressing at her jaw, asking her to tilt her head. Ryuko obeyed, brows furrowed. Satsuki leaned forward. “Am I catching you off-guard, now?”

Ryuko pursed her lips, her own hand reaching up to grab at Satsuki’s chin. “Not really. You like to touch.”

Satsuki hummed, tapping Ryuko’s chin ponderously in place of her own. “I do like to touch.” She squeezed at the small amount of skin on her jaw, made to tug there. “You don’t seem to mind.”

“You’re lucky I don’t, with the way you manhandle me,” Ryuko answered. She glanced over her shoulder. “How long does it take to fill up gas in a tiny motorcycle tank?”

Nonon caught her eye, seeming to feel her gaze on her — or maybe she was looking at her the whole time and with a sudden jolt, Ryuko felt even more guilty than she had ever felt — and jerked her head in her direction, greeting and question all rolled into one. Ryuko, hand on Satsuki’s shoulder, waved in the direction of her motorcycle. Nonon just raised her own hand, shot her the universal symbol to fuck off, then shifted into the universal symbol for wait. Ryuko sighed, as visibly as possible. 

She could feel Nonon’s eyeroll from where she stood.

“Apparently takes a long time,” Ryuko mumbled, finally done with their silent exchange. She looked back at Satsuki, but not without a grin in Nonon’s direction — not nearly as confident and reassuring she hoped it’d be. Satsuki looked down at her, mouth closed, brows slightly furrowed. Ryuko stared, shutting her own mouth. Her hand on Satsuki’s shoulder tightened.

Satsuki ran her thumb over the space between lip and chin, where Ryuko always got her pimples, her gaze shifting down to where her hands were. She felt her eyes on her lips, those thick brows of hers twitching closer together for the briefest of moments, before she drew away, patting Ryuko on the cheek as she took a step to the side. Satsuki sat on the edge of the trunk instead.

Half-afraid that she’d done something wrong, Ryuko glanced down at her before looking over at the gas station’s corner store instead. Bach’s opera continued, — Ryuko was pretty sure it was Bach now, Nonon preferred him over most musicians — but over the brass and the winds and all of those other sections Ryuko had trouble remembering the names of, she heard the light tap of Satsuki’s hand on the plastic edge of the car’s trunk. Ryuko’s head snapped back to Satsuki so quick she felt like she gave herself whiplash. She stared at her hand, then took the few steps she needed to take in order to plop down next to Satsuki. Satsuki lifted her arm. Ryuko took advantage of the space between limb and torso and nuzzled her way into that space, resting her hand on Satsuki’s thigh. Satsuki only sighed, indulgent, and brushed the outside of her fingers against Ryuko’s leather-clad shoulder.

Neither of them said anything. Satsuki drew her close, placing a kiss and then setting her chin on the crown of Ryuko’s head. Ryuko looked for Satsuki’s other hand, gripped it.

She thought of Don Giovanni, and soft hips, and funions, and then she wasn’t sure what to think, anymore.

“She’s thinking too hard,” Nonon said as she wheeled the bike over to the car. “Look at her stupid face.”

Satsuki tapped on Ryuko’s thumb as Ryuko straightened and got up. “She’s just scared,” she said, her hand sliding up under Ryuko’s shirt and laying a heavy smack to the hollow dip in the middle of her back. Ryuko only leaned against the touch but shifted away in order to examine her motorcycle.

“The fucking tank’s cap wouldn’t open at first,” Nonon said, as Ryuko circled the motorcycle. “Some sort of… I don’t want to think about what was crusting on the cap, actually. I’m not going to finish that description, I think.”

Ryuko only hummed, hand on the seat, testing its density. Nonon kept speaking, complaining about how much of a hassle it was, about nothing, just running her mouth, and Ryuko nodded, straddling the bike. Finally, with less difficulty than she expected herself, she reached over, grabbed Nonon’s chin as she continued to speak, and tugged her close. She kissed her, rushed, and their teeth clacked together, Nonon’s words dying at the base of her throat. A quick, loud gasp was what she let out instead, shifting into a quiet exhalation through her nose as Ryuko’s hand curled around the back of her neck and squeezed. Nonon must have gotten onto her tippy-toes as she pressed against Ryuko with much more force than she did before, and her hands grabbed the lapels of the taller girl’s jacket to tug her down. 

Nonon smelled like her perfume, and gasoline, and maybe a little of that old guy’s death garage, but mostly of perfume. Ryuko licked a broad lick against her lips, probably disgusting to anyone watching, and grinned against her mouth when Nonon took in a sharp inhalation and opened her own mouth to bite down on Ryuko’s lower lip in retaliation. It was almost like what Satsuki had done, but quicker, harder. Ryuko had never considered Satsuki to be  _ soft _ , especially compared to Nonon, but she was definitely the softer kisser of the two. 

A bit of the messier, kisser, though. As much as Nonon liked to say that Ryuko was bad, she wasn’t much better. Satsuki kissed with a sense of actual refinement.

Nonon pulled away, but not without another kiss, muttering, “You’re fucking disgusting,” under her breath.

Ryuko made a petulant noise at that, fingers lingering on Nonon’s neck after the kiss just as Nonon’s still held onto her jacket. Not entirely convinced, Nonon kissed her again, infuriatingly light. Ryuko moved to deepen it, but Nonon moved away in equal measure. She only succeeded in almost falling off the bike she was steadying herself on. After recovering and  clearing her throat, she straightened and moved her hands onto the handlebar of the motorcycle. “Okay. I’m gonna drive this thing.”

Nonon nodded, squeezing Ryuko’s tensed biceps as she passed by her to sit next to Satsuki.

“Be careful,” Satsuki reminded her. Ryuko turned her bike on with a huff.

“Thanks, Mom,” Ryuko shot back at her.

“I thought you only called me that in the bedroom,” Satsuki said, just as easily.

Ryuko flushed all the way to her ears. “That never happened, Nonon! Don’t listen to her!”

Satsuki smirked. “She called me Mom when she asked for milk for her cereal, once.”

“I did not!”

Satsuki looked down at Nonon, who was barely containing her laughter from behind her hands. “She says she called me ma’am.” She leaned on her, arm around her shoulders. “I think that would’ve been worse.”

“It would  _ not, _ ” Ryuko mumbled. “One’s a teacher or some shit, the other’s your fucking mom.”

“Well, mom is a cute slip,” Nonon said, settling her hand on Satsuki’s thighs after calming down. “Ma’am is like… It’s like you’re settling a business proposal.”

Ryuko only sneered at the two of them. “Stop ganging up on me!”

Nonon rolled her eyes. “Like you two didn’t do the same thing to me, and we didn’t do the same thing to Satsuki, tonight.” She smirked, and Satsuki rested her chin on her head. “Stop wasting the gas I so kindly paid for and go motorcycle, you moron.”

Ryuko let out an offended grunt at that, and revved the motorbike for emphasis. “Fine. I can see when I’m not wanted.” She kicked off. Then, with a little bit of difficulty, started to move.

The motorbike made sounds of protest, probably from not being used for so long, but it sputtered and spat its way to an even pace. Ryuko held onto the handlebars with her teeth grit, leaning forward, eye on the speedometer. She did small doughnuts in the gas station parking lot while Satsuki and Nonon looked on.

As usual, her ego got the better of her. With a cheeky grin and a rev of the handlebars, she increased the speed. It stumbled into some sort of almost-speedy pace, the entire bike vibrating as though all of its parts wanted to be as far away from the others as possible. Ryuko, realizing her mistake, tried to press the brake. Pumping the brake would have been the reasonable solution to her problem. What Ryuko did, however, could only be called a pump if pumps were defined as ‘a single sharp tightening around an object, followed by horrified screaming by three women and a pair of wheels (though the wheels’ screams could probably be better described as squeals, not screams),’ and, since it wasn’t that definition, Ryuko definitely didn’t pump the brakes like she was supposed to.

She ended up on her side, one leg pinned underneath her thankfully light, thankfully only looking on fire from its paint job and not actually on fire, motorbike. Satsuki and Nonon hovered over Ryuko, who was sort of staring distantly at the gas station corner store as though she wasn’t entirely sure what had happened in the past thirty seconds. Nonon bent down to turn the bike off, and Satsuki lifted it off of her leg. Ryuko, still distant, sat up and crossed her legs, watching Satsuki as she set the bike down.

“This is the shittiest bike ever,” Ryuko said. She leaned forward to rest her chin on her open palm, taking in the sights of her new bike, which was on its side like some defeated animal praying for death. “I love it, but it’s… God, it’s so shitty.”

Nonon pursed her lips, watching Ryuko watch her bike. “Do you want to try it again? Satsuki and I can like, hold onto you.”

“Like training wheels,” Satsuki supplied, hands on her hips.

Ryuko rubbed her temples. “I don’t wanna explode. I’m gonna bring it to a shop before I ride it again.” She sat there for a few moments, staring at the bike, blank face shifting into a frown. “There better not be a dead fuckin’ ferret in there.”

“Oh my God,” Satsuki said, while at the same time, Nonon said, “Jesus Christ.”

“And the Holy Spirit,” Ryuko finished, standing up. “Let’s bring this thing back in the trunk, please. I can’t stand to see my kid on its side.”

Satsuki complied, picking the bike up. “Would you like me to cradle it while I carry it to the car?”

“I know you’re joking, but honestly? If you did, I would probably die of laughter,” Ryuko said. Nonon tapped her on the temple before extending her hand to her. Ryuko yelped, brows furrowed. When Ryuko just looked down at Nonon’s hand while absently rubbing at her temple, Nonon flexed it impatiently. “Oh,” she said, realization dawning on her, as she gripped Nonon’s hand.

“You pull me down while I try to pull me up and you’re walking home,” Nonon said, halfway through catching Ryuko’s mind coming to the exactly what she was warning her about.

“I would never,” Ryuko said, rolling her eyes. She tugged herself onto her feet and dusted herself off, then bent down and placed a quick kiss to Nonon’s forehead. “Thanks, Troll Doll.”

Nonon huffed, flushing, and smacked Ryuko’s arm. “Don’t mention it.”

Satsuki cleared her throat, bike still in her arms. “Are we going?” she asked. She glanced at Ryuko, then at Nonon, then back at Ryuko.

Ryuko slung her arm over Satsuki’s shoulders, jostling her, and reached over to tug Nonon close and do the same to her. “Yeah, okay. Let’s go.”

Satsuki shifted, trying to hold the bike in her arms more comfortably, then glanced down at Ryuko. “Like this? Daisy-chained?”

“Uh, yeah,  _ duh, _ ” Ryuko said, rolling her eyes and taking the first step forward.

“Why do you get to be in the middle?” Nonon asked, getting dragged along.

“I’m in the middle because I’m the most important, and also because I’ve been mortally wounded by my bike,” Ryuko said easily, smiling pleasantly down at Nonon.

Nonon scoffed. “Wounded ego, maybe,” she muttered.

Satsuki snorted into the shoulder not touching Ryuko, trying not to laugh. Ryuko sputtered, trying to say something in her defence, but ultimately deflated, leaning all of her bodyweight against Nonon and Satsuki. Both women on either side of her struggled to keep upright with the dead weight that was their mutual girlfriend throwing off their center of gravity — especially Satsuki, who was still carrying Ryuko’s stupid bike.

Nonon whined, trying to shrug Ryuko off. “Could you— knock it off—?” she managed, as Ryuko only tilted her head back and let out a long groan. “Jesus  _ Christ _ .”

“Your words drained the last of my energy,” Ryuko said, head lolling towards Nonon. “You’re just paying the price, honestly.”

Satsuki was caught between laughing and grunting with effort. “Matoi, please, your child—”

“Our child,” Ryuko corrected. “You’re cradling her. She’s yours now, too.”

“A bit too soon for you to be parents, I think,” Nonon said.

“I wouldn’t call what I’m doing  _ cradling _ , really,” Satsuki added.

Ryuko just grunted, pouting. “Let me be happy for one microsecond.”

Satsuki just limped ahead, dragging Ryuko and, by proxy, Nonon along. Ryuko was going to comment that she looked like one of those big horses that tugged carriages along in carts, but she couldn’t remember what the breed was. If she had just said “one of those big horses that tugged carriages along in carts” she would have been made fun of by both Satsuki and Nonon for the  _ third _ time in a row, and she didn’t need that kind of embarrassment more than she already had. By the time she had come to that conclusion, Satsuki had stopped and dumped the bike in the trunk of the car, and the moment had passed. One less embarrassing thing to say, at least.

Nonon leaned against Ryuko, palm tentatively resting on her waist, so gently Ryuko almost couldn’t feel it through the thickness of her leather jacket. Ryuko bumped her hip to Nonon’s reassuringly. Nonon’s hand curled into the fabric under her fingers and let out a satisfied hum.

Satsuki closed the trunk, which should have been a relatively easy task considering her height and also because she had the strength of approximately three people of the national average’s strength. It definitely  _ would _ have been simple if she didn’t have most of Ryuko’s weight pressed against her, one arm, and no real way to move back without jostling everyone else. It didn’t help that neither Ryuko or Nonon didn’t help.

“Can we move to the back seat of the hummer?” Satsuki asked, although it sounded more like a huff, out of breath from having to carry both a bike and essentially two people worth of dead weight across a gas station parking lot.

Ryuko grinned up at her, fingers playing with the hem that connected shoulder to sleeve on Satsuki’s shirt. “Will you carry me the rest of the way?”

Satsuki heaved out a long sigh. “Well, I’ve already brought you this far,” she said, “so I suppose I could.”

“Yesss,” Ryuko sighed, leaning up against Satsuki and burying her face in the crook of her neck to show her appreciation. “Thanks, Eyebrows. Nonon too, right?”

“Nonon, too,” Satsuki said. Even without moving her face away from Satsuki's neck, Ryuko knew she was smiling from her tone. Ryuko let out a satisfied hum and kissed her neck, and she tightened her grip on Nonon’s shoulder. Then, with a grunt, Satsuki tugged the two of them the last few steps she needed to reach the back seat doors.

Nonon, in an act of either charity or chivalry, (or maybe even because she just wanted to sit) opened the door for the three of them, then clambered in. “Shithead, you’re really good at being dead weight,” she said as she made her way to the other end of the hummer.

Ryuko clambered in next, grinning all the while. “Thanks, babe. You’re good at supportin’ dead weight.” Ryuko extended her arm as Satsuki clambered in. Satsuki grabbed hold of it and let herself be pulled into the car, flopping against Ryuko’s shoulder with a long quiet groan. “You’re good at carrying things, too.” Ryuko kissed her temple contemplatively. “Like a packhorse. Or a mule.”

Satsuki let out a halfhearted bray at that, pressing her face to Ryuko’s leather jacket. With her foot, she reached out to close the hummer’s door. Ryuko simply stroked at her hair. 

“My little ass,” she mumbled, nosing Satsuki’s head. “My hardworking, buff, not so little ass.” She reached around and patted Nonon’s face. “You can be my little asshole.”

Nonon looked over at Ryuko, who had herself pretzeled into a position that let her keep her nose buried in Satsuki’s hair but also look at Nonon, who she was half-lying on. “Do I have to be your little asshole?”

Ryuko groaned. “C’mon. I wanna be the ass master. Master of all forms of asses.”

“Just let her be the ass master,” Satsuki said as she draped herself more thoroughly on both the seat and Ryuko. “You know how she gets.”

Nonon sighed. “Fine, but you get to be the prolapsed asshole in you get an ass-related nickname.”

Ryuko made a face at that, but Nonon interrupted her before she could get a word of protest in edgewise. “Look, you’ve got to compromise somewhere. No one gets to be a master without compromise along the way.”

“I’m not actually sure that’s how it works,” Ryuko said, frowning, “But fine. If it'll make you happy and let me call you little asshole, fine.”

Ryuko could tell the mistake she had made as soon as she saw the twinkle in Nonon’s eyes. It was a good thing Ryuko had thick skin and understood that the more Nonon teased people, the more she liked them — aside from Satsuki, who was a bit of a special case for most people, anyway. 

“My little raspberry,” Nonon murmured reverently. Ryuko let out a surprised bark of laughter and slumped against her, the side of her face resting against Nonon’s cleavage. Nonon stroked her hair and set her chin on her head with a chuckle of her own, and kissed the crown of Ryuko’s head.Satsuki draped herself more comfortably against Ryuko, who laid her arms across Satsuki’s shoulders in response. Nonon absently scratched Ryuko’s scalp, humming along to the opera still playing on the speakers.

“You’re going to kill your car’s battery, leaving it on like this,” Ryuko said. 

“What are you, a mechanic?” Nonon asked. “Anyway, if you want me to turn the car off, I’ll have to move and you’ll all get uncomfortable again.”

“Don’t turn the car off,” Satsuki said. “I like the music.”

“That makes two of us,” Nonon said. Ryuko could feel her smile against her scalp, and Ryuko reached up to grab her hand and hold it. Nonon spread her fingers over Ryuko’s palm before slotting them between her fingers and laying them down. 

“I like this stuff,” Ryuko protested. “The music, I mean. This opera stuff.”

“Do you really?” Nonon asked, and Satsuki lifted her head to look at her, eyebrows quirked up, silently asking the same question. 

“I mean, yeah. It’s no Linkin Park, but I can listen to it when you put it on.” Ryuko flushed as she added, “It reminds me of you.”

Nonon let out a surprised cough into Ryuko’s hair. Satsuki smiled at her, lips pursed as she held back a laugh. “That’s very sweet,” she said indulgently, as she turned over to lie on her stomach and set her chin on Ryuko’s collarbone. 

Ryuko glanced away, beet red, and mumbled, “It’s true, though.” Her fingers found purchase on Satsuki’s shoulder blades, and she rubbed at them, a distracted sort of massage. Satsuki seemed to lean more of her weight on her at the gesture, and her eyes lidded over, pleased.

Nonon only patted Ryuko’s face and said, “Well, I’m happy someone with such a rich musical palette likes my lowbrow music.”

Ryuko just shifted more firmly against the woman she was on top of, sighing and pressing her face to Nonon’s palm. She closed her eyes and buried her nose between the digits of Nonon’s fingers, breathed heavily, comfortably, on them. “It’s not  _ liking _ , exactly. I tolerate it because you’re cool.”

Nonon huffed. “You really have a way of ruining whatever nice things you say, don’t you?”

Satsuki smiled. “She has a way of sticking her foot in her mouth while digging her own grave, you mean.”

Ryuko kissed the tips of Nonon’s fingers. “It’s a talent of mine.” She turned her head to plant a kiss on her cheek and added, mock-sultry, “Among other things.”

Nonon only rolled her eyes and smushed her hand to Ryuko’s face, making a show of pushing her away. Ryuko only leaned against her hand, shifting higher and twisting around slightly in order to place a proper kiss on Nonon’s lips, who easily returned the favour. Nonon’s fingers curled around the shell of Ryuko’s ear, who let out a quiet shudder against her lips at the sensation, opening her mouth to run her tongue over the seam of Nonon’s lips. Satsuki pressed the heel of her hand to Ryuko’s hips, and she froze. Right. Right, they weren’t supposed to be just making out in the back seat of the car. When Nonon made to react, Ryuko pulled away and coughed.

“Nonon,” she said, wiping her mouth. “I need to talk to you about something.”

Nonon frowned, but she nodded anyway, waiting for Ryuko to elaborate.

The only good way she could say it, Ryuko reasoned, was quick and to the point. Like tearing off a band-aid. “I think… I really like you, but it’s—” Ryuko hesitated. “I want to understand how we feel about each other. I mean, like, obviously I wanna be with you if you’re still into me and everything, but I want to set some… Some—”

Satsuki spoke up. “Boundaries?”

“Yeah, well, I guess that word works,” Ryuko said, with a noncommittal shrug.

Nonon was still staring at Ryuko. “Could you get to the point? You’re making me nervous.”

“Right.” Ryuko took a deep breath in, trying to reorient herself. “I like you, but maybe not in the same way as Satsuki? Like… I love her? And I love you too, but differently. You’re fun, and great, and you push me, and that’s great, too. But it’s different.”

Ryuko tried to see if she could tell what Nonon was thinking from looking at her face, but came to the conclusion that she maybe wasn’t the best at reading faces. The most she could get from her was that she was digesting it all. Ryuko sighed and hoped for the best, now that it was out there, and felt Satsuki press her hand to her hip, reassuring her.

“I wasn’t expecting a marriage proposal, you idiot,” Nonon finally settled on saying, leaning back against the car door. “I know it’s different between us.” She rubbed the nape of Ryuko’s neck and let out a quiet sigh. “Thank you for being honest with me.”

Ryuko furrowed her brows, getting up to lean on her elbows. “Is that it?”

Nonon shrugged. “I mean, yeah? You just want us to keep doing what we’re doing, right?” She tugged Ryuko back down, pressed a quick, chaste kiss to her nose. “I’m okay with that. I never really had any huge expectations, but it’s nice that you spoke to me about this.”

Ryuko grunted. “It was mostly Satsuki’s idea.”

“Well, then,” Nonon said, reaching behind Ryuko to pat Satsuki’s head. “Thank you, dear.”

“Don’t mention it,” Satsuki answered. She sat up, then leaned over and pressed her own kiss to each of their cheeks. “Now that that’s been solved, let’s go home. I want to watch some Animal Planet and finish studying.”

Ryuko grinned up at Satsuki, then back down at Nonon, who only smirked.

“Get off of me, you big lug,” she said.

“Alright, alright,” Ryuko said, easing off of her. “Don’t have a conpiption.”

“Conniption,” Satuski corrected, just as Nonon let out a loud  _ snerk _ and said, “Conpiption?!”


End file.
